Vivianne

@abbynormal let's do that! We could start in pm or a brainstormtopic..

-First I need to finish dinner

We can make a difference!

How are you doing Kate? Keep this site close!! You can make it too!

3 hours ago, notsmokinjo said:

I grew up in a smoke free house and in Australia where the anti smoking lobby was about 20 years ahead of elsewhere...when I started smoking it wasn't cool ... Only idiots smoked .... As a teen most public places were already smoke free...but smoking for me was a bit if an FU to my mum but also all the safe places growing up, the grandparents, the aunts and uncles I'd get farmed out to smoked that smell to me was safety...and love. 

Just like you I quit when preggas and didn't stop until I finished feeding...but I knew it was just temporary I had no intention of making it permanent.

And how great is it that you are here now!! Making it permanent! Took a while, but hey - we are doing it anyway! FU Big Tobacco!  

10 hours ago, Linda Thomas said:

Vivianne, thanks for sharing your story.  

I grew up in a nonsmoking home.  Smoking to me was just a "Hey look at me, I am an adult".  It should have been "Hey look at me, what an idiot".

I continued to smoke for 42 years.  I even made my husband quit, after the kids were born, because he needed to be healthy to support us.  What a hypocrite I was because I couldn't quit.  I know he wanted me to but never shamed me.  He is thrilled that I have found the strength to quit through this forum.  Now I try not to look back.  I only want to look forward to the time I will, hopefully, recoup. 

I am so glad I can be a part of your journey to freedom.  I look forward to celebrating your many smokeless, days, months and years!!!!!

Addiction equals hypocritical thoughts and behavior. The human brain is well known for its denial and making right what's clearly wrong (that's why the brain is such an interesting subject) add this to an addiction and you have a great recipe for stupid behavior and thoughts.  
I am really happy to Linda that you are here on this train trip with me! Get ready for the parties!! 

8 hours ago, jillar said:

I love this post Vivianne, I was just thinking these same thoughts the other day! Smoking was such a normal thing, even a right of passage. Everybody smoked and you could smoke anywhere and everywhere. My mom would even have us light her cigarettes for her when she was driving

It's so weird if you think back - and that is also why I feel so cheated when I watch the documentaries. They have known the ugly truth for such a long time ugh

 

@Linda Thomas you are one strong and though cookie! I admire your honesty and openess too. 

Thank you for sharing!!

47 minutes ago, mightyboosh said:

Comon Viv, we can whinge and moan together but never with a cigarette in hand, that's the only stipulation

I'll make that deal with you Mighty!

Thank you for being so open about your experience- it means a lot to me.

*Hugs*!!!!!

I survived and it passed.. I feel way better then I did today.. 

@Paul723 and taking your advise right away! I am getting the dog and go for a long brisk walk in the rain... 

So if I don't respond right away, don't worry! I am walking it off!!

2 minutes ago, Paul723 said:

The place in your brain that is responsible for your survival on an emotional level is also where the nicotine receptors are located.  That's why nicotine addiction is tricky to overcome, your brain without nicotine will often switch over to a survival mode and dump adrenaline into your body.  This creates a panic and edgy feeling.  What helps is to start recognizing what's happening and use your rational brain to calm yourself.  This episode started with a dream.  Dreams aren't reality.  The reality is you have a kind and supportive boyfriend.  The reality is you haven't smoked.  Go for a walk to burn off the adrenaline.  Have you read about HALT?  Your strength is still there.  Have you read MLMR journey in the thread Introsuksion?

This helps alot!!

I did read them, but as a brain in panick mode does it didn't recall it when needed.

So thank you!!! This makes sense!!

@Lilly thank you so much.. kinda made me cry.. 

I will not give my ex, addiction and past any more power, you are right.. 

Having a hard time to seperate emotions from reality.. 

Ps. The fact that I posted this here means I do feel safe now.. and that's all on you guys..

I am way too cozy and lazy now to give into anything anyway lol

The relaxation exercises work...

(And that thread of a slap scared me straight! Haha)

Nope!!!

I will stay here as long as needed! Am even considering the year pledge..

You are all so very helpful! Thank you!! 

Thank you Jillar! Your air cigarette is quite famous by now.. I've seen it on the forum a couple of times, so I will give it a go!