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Death In The West - The Marlboro Story (Full Documentary)

jillar

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  1. jillar

    Removing the Fear of Relapse

    By jillar,


    General
    Jonny5
    Quit Date: 2011-12-21
    Posted April 10, 2014 
     
    I'm not afraid of relapse one single bit. It ain't ever gonna happen.

    Some of you are. And there's one huge reason for that....

    You have not closed the doors on your smoking past and evolved into a never again smoker, you have a lingering belief that smoking does give you some benefits and are abstaining through many methods. 

    Abstainance looks like my quit but it is fundamentally different. 

    There is no reason I would smoke ever and I hate smoke being anywhere near me. I am repulsed by the poisonous stench.

    Abstainance is going without what you want.

    You can abstain all your life, but it will never be the same as the true desire to never smoke again, and by definition it is never going to be as comfortable.

    You must discect your quitting mindset and remove any weaknesses to make it relapse proof.

    Seriously you have to remove all justifications. Including death of a child. Murder of a spouse. Terrible awful situations that you may face, and you must know that you would not find smoking to be a comfort.

    Then, like me, you will be forever free.

    This is the power and strength behind NOPE...it is not just a bashing word from the hardcore ex smoking police, it is the source of their quit strength.
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/490-removing-the-fear-of-relapse/
     
  2. jillar

    Anxiety Antidote

    By jillar,


    General
    cpk
    Quit Date: 02/04/2015
     
    Posted May 17, 2015 · IP 
     
    It has taken me awhile to figure out that the anxiety I have been experiencing since week 6 of my quit (now in week 15) is not directly related to quitting.
     
    Not smoking is the peaceful part of my life.
     
    The anxiety was there before I quit. I probably used smoking to try to keep the anxiety in check. I don't recall having "anxiety attacks" when I smoked.
     
    I have opted to use natural supplements, which are helping. This weekend I picked up a workbook on using DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy) to quell anxiety through cognitive and emotional restructuring --- that is, simply put, training my mind to not be anxious. I need to reprogram the software in my brain.
     
    I had gotten in the habit of being anxious. I now need to learn how to do life in a new way.
     
    I know that people sometimes relapse because they find they are more anxious not smoking and feel they can't cope. They think it is because they miss smoking. This was me in the past, before I joined QT and got educated. I never even considered that my anxiety had nothing to do with quitting smoking.  I used smoking to try to calm myself, but that probably made everything worse! I certainly felt like a physical wreck, and it's pretty hard to cope when you have smoking related headaches, respiratory distress, fatigue and a host of other physical problems. Now I have none of these physical problems.
     
    The good people on this site prodded me a bit to look closer, and to observe what was going on with my life. That is the beauty of QT...that quitters know the journey of self-discovery takes time and patience. (I especially remember Tracey suggesting this in a very gentle way.)
     
    I was a little bummed out to realize this state of being anxious was something lurking beneath my smoking addiction. However, accepting that this is something I have to work on is far better than endlessly relapsing, which is very bad for self confidence.
     
    Strength to strength. I think I read that somewhere on this site. That's how I see the non smoking journey. Moving forward, growing, and evolving. Saying n.o.p.e. is the first step.
     
    Lurkers who may be reading this...there is great HOPE --- and the promise that you will never again have to experience a disappointing relapse.
     
    I know I was like many...feeling scared to try to quit again, just thinking it would end in relapse.
     
    There is a way...to never, never, never relapse again, and to forever embrace the freedom of not smoking. The way can be found right here, right now, on QT.
     
    QT helped me to see I never again have to think about relapse because I have the skills now to be a nonsmoker for life. I have freedom from smoking forever
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/5348-anxiety-antidote/
     
  3. jillar
    Markus
    Quit Date: 02-19-2008
    Posted October 28, 2018 · IP  (edited)
     
     
    I haven't been around that much but I was here yesterday and was glad to see all of the long quits. I haven't written in a few years but would like to post a few thoughts about the quit process.
     
    Looking at the new and young quits, and the never-ending fight to gain a foothold on the sticky quit, I just wanted to let the newer quits I see on the QT know, that you'll get there too, by sticking to your plan and what you will learn as you stay quit.
     
    This is only a mind game, where your self control is being tested constantly. It wears on you as you overcome the triggering of craves through attrition, trying to process them simply as your mind/body healing itself naturally through recognition and reaction. That someting so elementary is so taxing is hard to understand sometimes.
     
    It really requires no action other than acknowledgement of the particular craving and the processing of it.
     
    Repetition is the key. The first triggers and craves that you will defeat are the ones you encounter the most. The most infrequent ones are the last to fall, and they do, through repetition.
     
    If you will just keep doing your normal daily and nightly activities sans the nicotine delivery, eventually you'll roll over the addiction and leave it behind. Sounds overly simplistic reading this but remember that you will trigger and crave and try to understand what caused it. Don't be alarmed and dont make a hasty judgement, because sometimes you can't put your finger on the particular cause to your effect.
     
    Could be romancing the cigarette subconsciously and missing that old smoky life, since things have changed and you don't know who you are sometimes. I mean you were this... smoker... and now maybe scared and are wanting to go back to what you see as normal. That is when you get tough and remember that you control your own mind and heart and that you call the shots. It's okay to feel weak, but know that you didn't get this way in a few days so it will take a few months of honest work to get out of the hole.
     
    You will make it, even if you feel like you won't. This will not kill you but it will make you unbelievably strong if you'll just stick to your quit plan and your back up plan, and allow yourself some time to heal.
     
    So be militant anti smoking, and  remember that you are in a fight and that you are unwinding your whole being from the addiction so walk like it and act like it.
     
    Once smoking and cigarettes were every part of you, and now...well now they are not. That hurts and that is painful, but it is the work you have to do, so let the process work. Pay it forward, and stay as strong as you can as you use what you have learned.
     
    And if you fall, it isn't the end. You start again. A dream becomes a wish, and that wish becomes your reality as you work the quit. Time is on your side now, so dont give that addiction any more of you. You're in control of your mind and body and you've taken the chains off. Don't put them back on.
     
    KTQ
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/11327-the-rear-view-mirror-and-years-quit/
     
     
     
  4. jillar

    The story of a mountain girl...

    By jillar,


    General
    Ladybug
    Posted August 22, 2014 · IP 
     
    I am a "mountain girl" and I know a thing or two about hiking. I was born in a small village in the Alps, directly on the boarder between Italy and Austria, hiking was mandatory -not optional. There was an old joke going around about babies being born with hiking boots, skies and a backpack and I assume its still being told until this day. Not so far off the truth, I have been told I could ski before I actually walked. 
     
     
    Sometimes tourists came to town and stayed for a while in houses like ours. They paid for "room and board" and were treated like King and Queens. Some of us were "hired" for guidance and it was serious business. We all knew the way through the forest and through the mountains; we knew what to show them and where to go to. All of us were able to guide them, however the hiking part was something they had to do on their own -very often for our entertainment (if I may say so). At first I was just the assistant, but then I got my first group alone when I was 15 and I was filled with pride. I planed the tour for days; I knew in which cabin we would eat, where we would rest and I packed my backpack with care. I knew from others that I could run into problems with the tourist-folks. A first-aid kit was needed, because some of them would get blisters as big as tennis balls, just because they went hiking with brand new fancy boots (really?) Some emergency food, flashlights, flares and some other "stuff" and I was ready.
     
     
    I got up at the crack of dawn and collected my tourists and off we went. I showed them the mountain in the distance, the one we would all climb and I got a mixed reactions. Some were excited and couldn't wait to be up there and some felt overwhelmed and started doubting themselves just by looking at it.
     
     
     
    It only took one or two hours depending on traffic (hayrides and tractor pick-ups) and we reached our destiny and could start our real hiking tour. The beginning is always the hardest, especially when it starts with a steep rise right away. I could hear them huffing and puffing and some wanted to turn around right from the start -like that was an option. It got better after a few hours, we left the treeline behind us and hiked in a steady pace, surrounded by beautiful vegetation and animals.
     
     
     
    There wasn't much complaining anymore, they pointed out the different views and enjoyed the tour. We took some breaks, drunk fresh cow milk and ate the apples and butter-sandwiches that we had packed. Even the shortest break somehow recharged the "complaint-department" and some of them started whining again. They wanted to "turn around" and just go back, they were complaining that their bones were hurting and that the tour was just too much, much more then they expected it to be.
     
     
     
    They really didn't have a choice, turning around was only a option in emergencies and they knew it. Some people are just born complainers, they will find a "hair in the soup" before the soup is even served. They expected shortcuts, more breaks and they were wishing for a cable lift and an easy transport right to the top.
     
     
     
    Of course that didn't happen. I was a tough girl, cracked the verbal whip (or played just dumb) and we continued our hiking tour. 
     
     
     
    A few hours later we made it to the top and were rewarded with a breathtaking view. Some just sat there quietly and took it all in, others made a big fuzz out of it. But we all were proud that we made it to the top. Now everybody was just in "awe" and even the one who complained the most, were finally quiet and just filled with pride and joy. Numerous pictures were taken, later on the evidence when they would talk about their hiking tour back home.
     
     
     
    I often read "I just stopped smoking...please pray for me" and I never really knew what to say, until today when I found this quote.
     
     
     "There are too many people praying for mountains of difficulty to be removed, when what they really need is courage to climb them."
     
     
    Isn't the road to freedom of an addiction like a hiking tour in the mountains?
     
     
    You don't need prayers, you need courage and strengths. Start hiking and don't look at it as being a difficulty, look at it as being the road to success. Hike without looking back and without complaints, look forward and think about how you will feel when you reach the top. No shortcuts, no help from a cable lift...just you and your addiction. Take it all in and look forward!
     
     
    Guidance is available at places like  https://www.quittrain.com -you don't have to "hike" alone, other ex-smokers will be on your side. It's similar to the AA meetings just online and it feels so good to talk to people who understand how you feel, because they all have started there on the foot of the mountain ones.
     
     
    In the future when I will read "I stopped smoking, please pray for me" a link to this post will be my answer 🙂
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/2384-the-story-of-a-mountain-girl/
     
  5. jillar

    The Guadalupe River

    By jillar,


    General
    This post was written by a member of another forum by the name of jwg and brought over to preserve it. And although I never knew him his ability to write about his addiction and his approach to dying spoke to me. RIP jwg.....
     
     
    A lazy Texas river spanning form Kerr county Texas to the San Antonio bay on the Gulf of Mexico.  If you ever need to find a place to relax enjoy the sunshine while refreshing from the hot Texas sun, nothing beats a lazy day tubing down the slow winding of deep greens and blue. Some place your arm able to reach down and feel the stones polished by the millenniums. Hiding secrets of the Alamo and days gone by. A sacred place, where no worries in the world can follow, No troubles from work are allowed to enter, only you and your desire to be at peace can break the waters edge.
     
    In my resent ventures over this past summer I had the opportunity to experience the river , its majesty and glory , Not only was I with the river I was with the finest people in the world to share the experience. By day floating lazily carefree and by night telling stories lounging about the cabin or sitting under the stars on the porch, cooking out burgers some night or fajita’s..
     
     
    I often think of that trip and the fun we all had, to go back in time , even in memory can be so nice . Some days we would float solo or holding hands keeping close together. other days we banded are pack together by twine and traveled the river as one , like a Robin Hood and his merry men , or maybe Tom Sawyer and some of his boy hood chums.
     
    One particular day we were going solo , but I lashed the tube with the cooler to my rig
    6 hours or so , surly you need some sort of refreshment and maybe even pull up on to  a clear shore line for  a bite to eat.. And so we did. After lunch two of are young explores
    Decided to forgo the tubes, swim a bit and comb the bottom of the river for secret hidden treasures,, Lost sunglass or the mother load a Iphone or other such valuable loot.
     
    Now with no use for there tubes , the young explores piled them on top of the cooler . So there I was, in my tube tied to a stack of three tubes and a cooler. To which the wind had greater strength to control then the  slow easiness of the river current.
    Some times I would find the wind speeding me along , while others the wind dragging me back and my group of merry band of men flowing down the river far in front of me.
     
    While still enjoying the river the ride and the scenery I really had no control of the speed of my travel , to which side of the river I would coast. Sometimes the wind would bring me in to the tree line . Catching me on limbs and others casting me out into the deeper waters. Basicly I was at the mercy of powers much greater then myself..
     
     
    As history repeats itself ,, this is where I find myself once more, only today laying in my hospital bed.
    With each  day that passes more tubes are added to my burden, and now with each tube the wind carries me faster down the river then we could have ever imagined.
     
    Just a few hundred yards back the option of chemo loomed in the air to slow the winds and the current giving me more time to enjoy the river, but now once  more due to powers beyond my control I find myself helpless. My illness grows faster then can be controlled.
     
    I am at peace, I am comfortable. I am in my tube enjoying every last minute of my ride
    Down the Guadalupe
     
    I can not see the end to the river nor do I look forward to its end..
     
    I have my friends , I have my family , I have you all , and I have the love of a beautiful women , my angel, my everything to comfort and care for me
     
    I love you all
     
     
    And will to my best keep you posted
     
     
    In the mean time
     
    Don’t put things in your mouth and light them on fire !!
  6. jillar
    October 30, 2016 · IP 
    The recovered alcoholic, the heroin addict, the nicotine addict, deep down each knows the "Law of Addiction."  They've heard it over and over again.  Just one sip, one tiny fix, or one little puff of nicotine, just once, that's all it takes and the addict is back!  They know that either immediately or in a short period of time they'll once again be slaves to their old level of drug use or greater.  We know the Law of Addiction so why do we break it?
     
    There are three primary factors associated with relapse: (1) rewriting the law of addiction; (2) an excuse; and (3) a vague memory.  It doesn't matter if it happens within two hours, two days, two weeks, two months, two years, or twenty, the factors remain the same and apply to all of us.  Rewriting the law of addiction is easy and you don't need a pencil, paper or computer to do it.
     
    Amending the Law of Addition
    "Just one puff" and then "do not pass go, do not collect $200, but go directly to the addict's prison and surrender your freedom for good."  It isn't that the recovering nicotine addict doesn't know or believe the law of addiction because we do.  It's just that we begin to believe that we're the exception.  We convince ourselves that we're stronger and smarter than those who discovered the law, and wiser than all addicts who came before us.  We amend the law.  We put ourselves above it.  "Just one, it'll be ok, I can handle it, I'm stronger than the others, a little reward, it's been a while, I've earned it."
     
    I'm sorry.  As soon as such thoughts begin infecting the mind they tend to start feeding on themselves and in all likelihood your body's period of healing and freedom is over.  Your dreams and hard work are all being thrown into a dirty toilet that one puff of nicotine is about to flush.
     
    Instead of saying that you can handle "just one," a truthful statement would have been "I can handle them all, give them all back to me, my entire addiction, all the ashtrays, the coughs, the stink, the endless stream of 4,000 plus deadly chemicals that come with each puff (including up to 81 known cancer causing agents), the constant gradual destruction of every cell in my lungs and the gradual clogging and hardening of every blood vessel in my body, the 50/50 chance of killing myself 13-14 years early, all the money it will cost me to stay enslaved for years and years to come (together with massive future price increases designed to get me to quit), the growing social pressures that will make me feel even more like an outcast, I want it all back, all of it!"
     
    It's far easier for the junkie mind to create a one puff or one cigarette exception to the law" than admit the truth.  A one pack a day addiction is 7,300 cigarettes a year.  Don't picture smoking just one.  Instead, picture yourself sticking at least a year's supply into your mouth all at once. Try fitting them all into your mouth because in truth that's exactly where they'll be going, year after year after year.  "To thine own self be true."   You deserve the truth - you paid the price - you earned it.
     
    The Perfect Excuse
    The excuse can be anything.  Usually the addict waits for that great excuse to come along, but some get tired of waiting and any old excuse will do.  Even joy!  A reunion with an old smoking buddy, a few drinks with friends, a wedding, a graduation, or even a baby's birth and a free nicotine laden cigar, or trying a harmless looking new nicotine delivery device like the 27 flavors of suckers, the straw, lozenges, candy or even nicotine water or soda, why not!  But joyful or even stupid nicotine relapse is harder to explain to yourself and those you love.
     
    The smart nicotine addict waits for the great excuse, the one that we know we can sell to ourselves and others.  As sick as it may sound, the easiest to sell and the best of all is the death of a loved one.  Although everyone we love is destined to die and it'll happen sooner or later, for the reformed addict it's the perfect excuse for relapse.  I mean, who can blame us for ingesting highly addictive drugs into our bodies upon our mother's death.  Anyone who does would have to be extremely insensitive or totally heartless!  Right?  Losing a job, the end of a relationship, serious illness, disease or financial problems are all great excuses too - it's drug time again!  The addict is back!
     
    Lost Memories
    But an excuse doesn't work alone.  It needs help.  Failing memories of "why" we were willing to put ourselves through the anxieties and emotion of physical withdrawal, and weeks and weeks of psychological adjustment in order to break free, breathe fatal life into any excuse.  Most of us failed to keep a detailed record of why we commenced recovery or what it was like.  Instead, we are forced to rely upon our memory to accurately and vividly preserve the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.  But now, the memory in which we placed all our trust has failed us.
     
    It isn't that your memory is bad, faulty or doing anything wrong.  In fact, it's working as it should to preserve in as much detail as possible the joyful events of life, while forgetting, as quickly as possible, all the pain and anguish that we've felt, including our disdain for the addict's life we lived.  To have our brains do otherwise would make life inside our minds unbearable.  If women were forced to remember the true agony and intense pain of childbirth, most would have just one.  We are each blessed with the gift to forget.
     
    So how does the reformed nicotine addict who failed to keep accurate records of their journey revive their passion for freedom and recall liberty's price?  If we forget the past, are we destined to repeat it?  Not necessarily.  It doesn't have to be.  But just as any loving relationship needs nourishment to flourish, we can never take our recovery for granted or the flame will eventually die and the fire will go out.  We have to want to protect this glory until the day we die.  We have to turn that "want" into action.  If we do, we win.  If not, our fate may be up in the air with serious risk of relapse followed by crippling disease or even a very early grave.
     
    Whether it's daily, weekly or monthly, our recovery needs care.  If you don't have a detailed log to regularly review when faced with adversity, upon each anniversary of your quit, or at each birthday, do your best to create one now.  Talk to those still smoking and ask for help in revitalizing your memories.  Encourage them to be as truthful as possible.  Although they may look like they're enjoying their addiction to smoking nicotine, the primary joy they get is in keeping their body's blood serum nicotine level within the comfort zone, so as to avoid the onset of the anxieties and craves of early withdrawal.  Show them your pen and paper and invite them to help you create your list.  You may even cause a spark in them.  Be kind and sincere.  It wasn't long ago that those were our shoes.
     
    Also, try envisioning the first week. What was it like?  Can you still feel the powerful craves as your body begged and cried to be fed?  Can you still feel the pain?  Do you see yourself not being able to concentrate, having difficulty sleeping, feeling depressed, angry, irritable, frustrated, restless, with tremendous anxiety, a foggy mind, sweating palms, rapidly cycling emotions, irrational thinking, emotional outbursts or even the shakes?  Do you remember these things?  Do you remember the price you paid for freedom?  Do you remember why you were willing to pay it?
     
    If you have access to a computer, you won't need a smoker's help or even to recall the early days of your own journey.  You can go on-line to scores of smoking cessation support groups and find thousands of battles being fought, hear tons of cries and watch hundreds struggling for survival as they cling to the promise of the rich sense of inner calmness, quiet and comfort that lies beyond.  Visit as often as possible.  Make a few posts to those in need.  The most important thing you can tell them is the truth about why you are there.  Tell them how comfortable and complacent you've become.  It's what they yearn to hear!  Many smoked their entire adult life and have a difficult time believing that withdrawal isn't permanent.  Fear of the unknown is frightening.  Help them and in doing so help yourself.
     
    If you find yourself attempting to rewrite the law of addiction, stop, think, remember, read, revisit, revive and give to others, but most important, be honest with you.  Terrible and emotional events will happen in each of our lives - such is life.  Adding full-blown nicotine relapse to any situation won't fix, correct or undo your underlying concern.  In your mind, plan for disaster today.  How will you cope and keep your healing alive should the person you love most in this world suddenly die?  What will you do? 
     
    Remember, we've only traded places with our chemical dependency and the key to the cell is one puff of nicotine.  As long as we stay on this side of the bars, we are the jailors and our dependency the prisoner. We only have two choices. We can complete this temporary period of adjustment and enjoy comfortable probation for life or we can smoke nicotine, relapse, and intentionally inflict cruel and unusual punishment upon these innocent bodies for the remainder of their life, together with inviting a 50/50 chance that you'll be putting yourself to death. If the first choice sounds better - comfortable lifetime probation - then we each need only follow one simple rule - NEVER TAKE ANOTHER PUFF!
     
    Breathe deep, hug hard, live long!
    John
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/7669-caring-for-our-quit-by-john-r-polito/
     
  7. jillar

    Who's in Charge?

    By jillar,


    General
    cpk
    Quit Date: 02/04/2015
     
    Posted March 28, 2015 · IP 
    When you were a smoker trying to quit did you sometimes wish you could buy "just one"?
     
    In my town a few stores used to sell single cigarettes. The singles they sold were stinky and stale and expensive, and it was like the tobacco industry was laughing in your face like "gotcha!" you will even buy a stale cigarette. What's next?, picking butts up out of the gutter?
     
    Sure, you can bum one. But then when you get home, and it's late, and the demon's awake? Then who's in charge?
     
    When you relapsed, do you remember thinking, "I wish I didn't have to buy a whole pack... I only wanted one, or two." ?
     
    When you relapsed, do you remember thinking, "I just bought this pack today and it's full. I'll quit tomorrow..." ?
     
    When you relapsed, did you find a crushed up cigarette pack in a pocket, with one or two left ? Do you remember your jolt of pleasure?
     
    The tobacco industry knows. It knows it's in charge because you are the addict.
     
    That pack of 20 -- those industry devils must have had it figured out --- the average amount in a day's supply for the addict. A smoke or a couple every hour, just enough to keep the fire stoked...
     
    Hell, if smokes were sold as singles...you might have to work harder to get from one smoke to the next...there might be time...to THINK.
     
    The tobacco industry doesn't want thinking smokers on its hands. It wants addicts.
     
    It's a powerful thing to quit. It's a powerful thing to wake up in the morning and feel deep down inside, "I'm in charge. I drive the bus. I say what I do with my time today. I spend money on things I like today. I am a free person today."
     
    The tobacco industry devils aren't going anywhere. They are at the edge of the parking lot, with their brass knuckles on, blowing smoke downwind, towards you. They want you addicted. They don't want to politely offer you "just one" --- they want you addicted to one times a billion+. When you're dead they will step over your body and stalk the next victim.
     
    So, who's in charge of YOUR WORLD today???
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/4925-whos-in-charge/
     
  8. jillar

    nicotine replacement therapy

    By jillar,


    General
    babs609
    Quit Date: 07/13/2012
     
    Posted March 2, 2015 · IP 
    It's not what you think...at least not in this post.
     
    Many people who "attempt" to quit smoking hope and pray for it.  They just crush their last few cigarettes when they are sick of themselves...of course, they just put out a cigarette when they do this so they feel all brave.  (20 min later--digging through the trash to find those cigarettes--I admit-I did that)
     
    Then you have those that do quit--they just "put it down" and never looked back.  My dad was like that.  One day..he just decided and never once did he claim to have a hard time.  He never took a puff after that...not one.  It's people like him that all smokers look up to...hoping one day that we will wake up and just not want to smoke any more.  I waited for that moment for 15 years and it never happened.  Not for longer than 2 hours anyway. 
     
    Most people who have an addiction--whether it's to smoking, food, drugs, alcohol, people, sex...whatever it is...they can't just "put it down" without a replacement.  There has to be a plan...there has to be an alternative.  Simply refraining from smoking is not enough...even though that's all you have to do to stay quit....one day at a time, just NOPE.  But still...something has to be put in it's place.
     
    This is why many quitters who are not fully educated about the addiction gain weight..or drink more..or may engage in other activities not healthy for them.  Their life and situation gets worse and they blame the fact that they quit smoking....when in fact it was because they didn't find a healthy alternative.
     
    For me...that replacement was exercise, meditation..and eating healthy.  It's become my new addiction.  Makes perfect sense since quitting smoking is all about taking care of myself and healthy living....I love it and I don't mind that I'm a little obsessed with it.  I dream about running sometimes...and when I am heading to work and see someone running..I am jealous and want to be running too...I am constantly looking up new healthy recipes and finding fun activities I would like to try that involve fitness or just "moving" like kayaking and rock climbing..I bought a bike over the winter and can't wait to get on it.
     
    What's your Nicotine replacement therapy?
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/4645-nicotine-replacement-therapy/
     
  9. jillar

    Why Did I Join A Quit Smoking Forum?

    By jillar,


    General
    Tink
    Quit Date: 22/11/2013
    Posted April 13, 2014 
     
    I am not a social media buff, I only have facebook where its my family and friends, people I have known most my life or who I trust and feel comfortable around (I only have about 150 friends added)
     
     I was not good on computers, I can be a bit of a technology phobic -
     
    so why did I join a quit smoking forum?
     
    I really wanted to quit smoking is the answer and I did not feel that I could do it alone, I was looking for support, my whole family smoked and I needed support away from that environment, some place where I could just concentrate on me and my quit, no judgement, no keeping quiet about it and if I needed to moan or was going through a hard time, there was going to be someone looking out for me and keeping me on the straight and narrow when the going got tough because those people supporting had the same goal as me or had walked the path before me.
     
    As soon as I joined I was warmly welcomed and I felt apart of the place straight away
     
    I quickly learned that education, support and understanding played a huge part in me quitting smoking
     
    being around ex smokers who have no other interest but to help you quit smoking, no monies are to be made here, no corporate fog, no quit smoking tea is being sold here, its just truth and experiences and support and that gave me confidence and trust.
     
    Its just us ex smokers here, helping each other, educating each other and the thing I love the most is this forum is run by ex smokers 
     
    I hope that if you are thinking about quitting or have quit and are looking for what I was to help you then please consider joining - I have not regretted one single second of my experience here on QuitTrain.
     
    Kind Regards 
     
    Tracey
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/595-why-did-i-join-a-quit-smoking-forum/
     
  10. jillar

    COPD and Smoking

    By jillar,


    General
    jillar
    Quit Date: May 29, 2016
     
    Posted May 28
     
    As many of you know I was officially diagnosed with severe emphysema and COPD after I had respiratory failure in January of 2020. Most of you also know that for years I was struggling with breathing issues that I was told was asthma. In the two years leading up to my respiratory failure I went from 110 pounds on a 5'5" frame to just 79 when I was admitted into the ICU. My prognosis at that time was pretty grim, get better or go home on hospice. But either way I was also going home on oxygen. Since then I have put most of the weight back on and continue to feel myself get stronger each day. So then what's the point of this post you may be asking and its this....
    I found a great group for people with COPD on Facebook which is ironic because I never used Facebook pre pandemic but the group is awesome. So many people that can relate and answer the many questions those of us newly diagnosed have. Much like our community does. 
    Here's the sad part, I read post after post from members of that group still smoking. Some are on oxygen and still smoke!  I of course pass our site on to them and I hope they find their way here. Its just really sad to see. There's even a few who's Drs have refused certain procedures because they're smoking. Life saving procedures too I might add.
    COPD is a progressive disease with no known cure. It can be slowed with proper medications and quitting smoking. Sadly we can have it for years and not even know it until we get an exacerbation. Mine was thought to be asthma. 
    My day consists of trying to keep my 50' oxygen tubing out of the walkways and from getting caught in the doors. I'm embarrassed to go anywhere because people will be whispering things like "that's what happens when you smoke" etc. My poor dog and cat also have to dodge it while I'm walking down the hall to feed them. Its no way to live.
    I'm not looking for any sympathy I just want to put a brutal face to this terrible addiction in the hopes it helps someone quit or keep their quit.....
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/15648-copd-and-smoking/
     
  11. jillar

    I'm A Quitter

    By jillar,


    Blogs
    My husband loves to tell anyone who will listen that I'm a quitter. I "quit" my twenty year professional cleaning service ( actually the high costs of Workers comp in the state at the time forced me to close). 
    I quit my ice cream truck business (because it sucked watching everyone having a good time while I was out putting two steps forward and ending up one step back).
    I quit throwing shingles to him up on the roof ( that one was his own fault for being a jerk on the roof). 
    And then I quit smoking...
    I've quit quitting many a time and never really called them relapses because quite honestly I never quit to begin with. I simply abstained for a while.
    I really had to work myself up to just doing it. I gave myself little pep talks for months leading up to my forever quit. Saying things like "all good(?) things must come to an end". Then I would remind myself of all the things I had outgrown and convinced myself that smoking would soon be one of them.
    So on Sunday May 29, 2016 around 5:00 pm I smoked the last cigarette in my pack and that was that. Or so I thought.....
    Over the next five or so hours I proceeded to smoke every butt in my ashtrays. You see, I didn't tell anyone I quit just in case I failed so I hadn't cleaned and put away the ashtrays. So on Sunday May 29, 2016 at 10:15 pm I quit. 
    It wasn't always easy and some days were downright brutal for me but most of that was my own darn fault. I didn't embrace the beauty in being a quitter. I was too busy feeling sorry for myself for not " getting" to smoke like everyone else could. 
    Looking back now i truly believe your mindset is what is going to dictate how hard or how easy your quit will be. Choose easy....
  12. jillar

    The best things about not smoking

    By jillar,


    General
    larklibby
    Quit Date: 8th March 2015
     
    Posted April 18, 2015 · IP 
     
    For me, the best things about not smoking, becoming a non smoker, are the small things. I have never been driven by 'how bad' smoking is for your health, of course, clearly, smoking is terrible for your well being. Somehow, my brain had learned to navigate around that fact, because of the nicotine, the drug; It was dismissed - 'it won't happen to me' attitude. So finding a driving factor for my quit has never been clear cut, until one day I had a moment of clarity.

    The day I threw away smoking out of my life, the day before I found this wonderful website, I saw sense. I had been thinking about quitting for about a month, but as ever with a quit 'it was never the right time'. So I had been soul searching for a reason that I know would help me achieve the quit. Of course I had the normal reasons: financial, health and 'you ain't getting any younger!' And then after 25 years of smoking, it hit me, it was obvious. I realised that nicotine had control over me.

    I was in every sense a 'slave' to a drug. A junkie. 

    My day would be structured around smoking. Did I have enough smokes. When I would smoke. Do I have enough smokes for tomorrow? All this would go through my head first thing in the morning, sometimes even before bed the night before. It seemed normal.

    To not have that constraint on my thoughts and movements really is an indescribable euphoria. It's finding inner freedom, shaking off a dependency that gave me nothing. All the things I thought I couldn't do if I stopped smoking, I can, and better: Socialise, be creative, and concentrate. 

    Yes the first two weeks were a bastard nightmare, but, I would do it again in a blink of an eye if I knew it would get me to where I am now. 

    Even after just a month, I feel brilliant. A million times better than I did after having a smoke. I still have a journey I know, however whenever I now get the urge to smoke, I visualise a prison cell in my head, and say to myself if I smoke again I will be walking back into that cell. It works, it works for me - I will never want to lose this feeling I have.

    So anybody thinking about stopping smoking, not only look at the health and financial aspects of smoking, but see it as taking back control of your life, take the helm back - it's yours. 
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/5141-the-best-things-about-not-smoking/
     
  13. jillar

    The Promise is Real. Wow!

    By jillar,


    General
    cpk
    Quit Date: 02/04/2015
     
    Posted July 1, 2015 
     
    I don't know if month 5 is like going around a big bend towards magical month 6, but the promise that "it gets better" is not just empty words. I still have anxiety, but not as much. There are actually some days when I don't think about smoking at all. When I go through rough patches of anxiety or a crummy day I remind myself, "Everything isn't always about quitting smoking."
     
    This is a really exciting journey. It has been hard, but SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO worth the effort.
     
    This post is for newbies, in the early days and weeks of quitting. It can be hard. But it gets easier.
     
    Sometimes it's hard to get through the hours.
     
    Then suddenly a whole day, or days go by in utter freedom.
     
    HANG ON. The promise is real. It DOES GET BETTER
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/5573-the-promise-is-real-wow/
     
  14. jillar

    Are You a Believer?

    By jillar,


    General
    babs609
    Quit Date: 07/13/2012
    Posted September 20, 2016 · IP 
     
    Life is really so simple...WE are the ones who make it complicated
     
    Because the truth is....if you BELIEVE the cigarette will give you any kind of comfort or joy...then you will suffer a great deal.  Not just in the early part of your quit, but for YEARS after...if you can stay quit that long.
     
    This is where the education part comes in.   If there is something you want that you believe will make you feel good...most people don't have the willpower to refrain from.  Those that do...are miserable and live their life miserably always thinking they are being deprived.  They aren't.  It's all in their head.  All about their belief system.
     
    I remember a show that was on...not sure if it still is but it was called 'My Strange Addiction.  The people on that show had some of the strangest addictions I had ever heard of.  I only watched 1 episode and on this episode..there was a couple who became addicted to coffee enemas.  Their addiction became so bad that they took turns taking care of their kids so the other parent could spend 8 hours in the bathroom giving themselves an enema. 
    That sounds crazy to you, right?  Of course!  But to them...it relieved them of their suffering.
     
    Well folks.....that is how non smokers look at smokers.  With good reason....because after the initial physical withdrawal that only lasts a short while....that is exactly how it is.  All in your head!  You believe in it.  Because you believe in it...you obsess over it.  Because you obsess over it...you drive yourself crazy trying to convince yourself maybe this was a bad time to quit...maybe just one puff...maybe i'll just be a social smoker...maybe this..maybe that.  There is no maybe.  YOU STILL BELIEVE--and until you de-program your brain with constant reading, videos, repeating NOPE, mantras like 'there is no such thing as 1 cigarette"  or just constantly remind yourself that you are a non smoker, that smoking a cigarette DOES NOTHING NOTHING NOTHING for you..until you reverse the programming that has been in your head for so long...you will always suffer, you will always be a minute away from relapse...you will always struggle.
     
    Even though there are thousands of "excuses" why people relapse or smoke...here are the most common BS lies.
     
    1.  Boredom--what's more boring than putting something in your mouth and lighting it on fire...really?  I can think of a thousand more things to do with my time. 
    2.  Anxiety--smoking increases your heart rate thus..increasing the anxiety (the only time smoking relieves you of any symptoms are when you are in the withdrawal period and it only gives you relief because you are feeding the addiction)
    3.  Help you concentrate--Really?  again...an illusion  (after the first few days)  Smoking adds thousands of chemicals to the bloodstream and ultimately decreasing the oxygen to the brain.  How does that really help??  We need oxygen to THINK...not jet fuel.
    4. " I'm under too much stress right now" This is life, you will always have stress.  The smoking trap was designed to hook you for life.   The only 'good time to quit'  is NOW.
    5.  ANY OTHER LAME EXCUSE ENTER HERE...cause that is what it is. 
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/7522-are-you-a-believer/
     
  15. jillar
    Rain Forest
    Quit Date: May 13, 2009
    Posted April 21, 2014 · IP 
     
     
    When you first quit smoking, the most horrible people to be around are the ones still smoking, and it’s not because they smoke.
     
    It’s because they don’t understand at all, you are making them feel guilty as hell because you are doing what they “wish” they could do, and they are almost worst than the Nicodemon and it’s craves: they try to get you to smoke.
     
    I relapsed a few times before I found my sticky quit… but I sure remember when I first started “trying” to quit, I was still working in an office… all my smoking buddies would come by my desk to get me for our breaks, even offering me a cig… I heard it all, the “so you’re still not smoking?” and “I wish I could quit too, here, come have a smoke with us, one won’t matter.”  Then even worse, they hid from me as if what they were doing was sneaky.
     
    I felt particularly bad for this one woman I worked with because she is the reason I quit smoking.  She had been to the doctor and was told if she didn’t quit, she’d be dead in a few years because of various health issues… so they put her on Chantix and she was able to quit smoking… now I saw this: she wasn’t upset, she didn’t seem to have trouble with her quit… so I went to my dr and asked for Chantix too… then I used it… well, the first time I lasted a few months (I was still not educated on my addiction, didn‘t have a clue what I was doing)… my friend ended up going back to smoking as soon as she stopped the Chantix.  But I couldn’t keep happily smoking… once I was quit for more than a few days, I started to see that it’s possible to quit for good.
     
    It took me another year before I found my sticky quit, so please, even if you relapse, DO NOT QUIT QUITTING!!!  You can do this, you truly can.  Do not give up.  One of these times, a bell will go off in your head... kinda like what the fox says... DING DING DING DING DING DING DING DING!!! lol
     
    This past year, my friend had a really huge scare… they found something on a cat-scan on her lung, and she was terrified that “this is it”.  She lived thru the whole Christmas holiday in fear, thinking the worst… she told me she will quit smoking if it’s not cancer…  Well, after the new year, she found out there was nothing there, she was ok.  She’s still smoking with no plan to quit.  God, I hate to say this, but she is gonna die a smoker.
     
     
    Are you?
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/831-newly-quit-stay-away-from-smokers/
     
  16. jillar

    No Man's Land

    By jillar,


    General
    Nancy
    Quit Date: 07/07/2013
    Posted March 23, 2018 · 
     
    By tahoehal  on May 13 2008 
     
    I seldom start a post, unless it is to honor someone's anniversary. But I feel compelled to share something that I seem to be sharing a lot of lately... and that is my thoughts on 'No Man's Land'. No Man's Land is a dangerous and scary place... and it is a lonely time during a quit.

    I call No Man's Land that period of time between about 1 month and 3 or 4 months into your quit, or about the time from the end of your first month.. This is a time when many people slip and go into a full relapse and have to start over... if they can start over, that is. I have some observations that may help some of you who are literally hanging on by your fingernails... or who may find yourself there tomorrow.

    The first month is an exhausting but exhilirating experience... you are locked in nearly daily struggles and you get the satisfaction of successfully beating your addiction that day. You go to bed a WINNER each night (as Troutnut would say), and you are justifiably proud of yourself. Your friends and family are also supportive as they see you struggling each day to maintain your quit. And you are being constantly supported here, whether or not you post... just being here is good for your quit. And so, the battles are won and it actually becomes easier and the battles occur less often as you finish 30 days or so.

    Around 60 days, you're starting to have some really good days, with very few craves and some nice insights about yourself... but then again, you still have some bad days. Those bad days can really be depressing... you begin to wonder if you're ever gonna be able to relax. Your junkie is whispering to you, telling you that 'just one' won't hurt. You've conquered your daily triggers, but now you start trippiing over the occasional ones... a death in the family, unexpectedly bad news, money problems, health problems, going on a long car ride, a trip to the bar, or whatever. You have a strong crave and you begin to doubt your ability to keep your quit. 

    In addition, the 3D support that you used to get is pretty much gone... non-smokers figure you should be 'over it' by now, smokers don't like to hang around you much because they feel guilty and addicted (remember that feeling?), and people who have quit may not remember just how much love and support you need well into the first few months. They all think you should be 'over it', you think you should be 'over it'... and the temptation is to have 'just one' to see if you ARE over it.

    But of course you're not over it, are you? That 'just one' whisper becomes much much louder and becomes 'just one more'... and each time you give in to that whisper, the craves come harder and sooner. The one way to guarantee that your craves will never go away is to light up, to slide that old cigarette needle into your arm and shoot up. Those craves will be back and keep coming back. But if you protect your quit, your craves will eventually weaken and become even fewer and farther between.

    As you get to around 100 days or so (some will be a bit longer)... you will begin to really get a healthy perspective on your addiction. You will see the huge role that smoking played in your life, you will see clearly what that addiction really cost you. And you will understand that it was a very high price to pay... the loss of your confidence, your emotions, your self-control... your SELF. All enslaved to your addiction.

    And you will begin to see that you can look forward to a non-smoking future without romanticizing your addiction. You see it clearly for the life-stealing evil it was... and is. You see a much different future for yourself than your past has been. And it no longer scares the crap out of you to think that you are done smoking... in fact, you embrace that thought with joy every day.

    But you have to get out of No Man's Land first. How can you help yourself? And how can those of us who have been through it help you?

    First of all, you need to understand that you aren't alone. If you haven't already done so, make a pinky-finger promise with 2 or 3 good quitbuds and exchange phone numbers with them. Promise to call them if you're ever in trouble, and make them promise the same. These are your 'life and death' quitbuddies... you are literally trusting each other with your lives. Then call them... often. Just to see how they are doing, and to tell them you're doing well too. Be totally honest with them, this is life and death.

    Second, understand that you're going to have some unexpectedly bad days... but they are going to be further apart. Shrug them off, laugh your way through them, call your quitbuddies... whatever it takes to get through them without smoking. Some battles will be easy, some will be hard. Come here and post, send qmail, exercise, learn to cook, take up a new hobby. Whatever it takes, keep going to bed a WINNER each night.

    Third, ask some of the older qsters to keep an eye on you... to contact you to see how you're doing. I have been asked to do that for several of you recently and I am happy to do that, as I am sure that others are too. We know that you just need to hold on a little bit longer and change your focus just a little to make that breakthrough. And then you will OWN your quit, and it will be a very comfortable thing.

    Last, take a deep and honest look at your past life... your life as a smoker and compare it to what your life is like now... and what it will be like in the future. You have to develop that vision of your future, of the person that you are going to BECOME now that you have freed yourself. You have to believe in yourself. You have to love yourself enough to deny yourself your addiction.

    No Man's Land doesn't have to be so lonely and scary and dangerous. You need some company and some courage and some faith in yourself. And when you emerge from it, you will not be the same person that entered it.

    Never never never question your decision to quit! This is the most loving thing that you will ever do for yourself. A few days of discomfort in exchange for a lifetime of freedom. You will never find another deal like it.

    Protect your quit. Don't smoke, no matter what.


    Hal 08-20-2004
    A puff is too much, a thousand cartons are not enough. 
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/2704-no-mans-land/
     
     
  17. jillar

    Mental Balloons

    By jillar,


    General
    gonfishn21
    Quit Date: 11.15.15
     
    Posted March 1, 2018 
     
    For Nancy
     
    Mental Balloons
    Posted by gonfishn21 on 16 January 2015 - 06:17 PM
     
    As I'm now chasing the tweenie label, and have been thinking a lot about the concerns I have had regading No Man's Land, its got me thinking again.
    As most of you know, that means I'm going to ramble.

    Although I am not one that needs a lot of kudos, it seems that it is a necessary part of this process for a while.
    We make it through day 1 HURRAH!!!!!!!!!!
    We make it through hell week HURRAY!!!!
    Heck week over, " I feel better" HURRAy!!
    Two weeks, wow, learning to get through the craves, HURRay!
    Three weeks, can be around my friends and family without committing a felony, HURray
    Four weeks, nerves under control, waistband a little tight, not bad, HUrray
    Five weeks, walking, eating right, digestion shut down, but not smoking, Hurray
    Six weeks, no craves, no moods, no smoking, digestion shut down, HUH?
    Seven to eight weeks, no one wants to know but you, how you are doing. By the way, my digestion is shut down!
    They really stopped wanting to hear weeks ago, you just kept talking about it. You can see it in their eyes when you walk up. They probably have a pool about how long it will take you to bring it up. Or even worse, the day your digestion works!
    Yeah, wow woot woot yippee, big deal.
    Hello No Man's Land'
    How am i going to keep going with this?
    I need to bring my own ballons to the party. I know my friends and family care, but they dont get it.
    Even as firm as I have been since day one, this is one of the hardest things I have ever done. I know it, thats all that matters.
    As i reach the little milestones ahead, I need to be the one who says HURRAY!!!!!.
    I need to be the one who acknowledges the accomplishments. Afterall, in the end, I made the decision to quit, I made it through hell week, heck week, and i am the one who may never digest food again.
    I need to remind myself everyday, how much I have accomplished, BEFORE I have a chance to get weak. In that way, I can stay ahead, be ready to face any challenge with a strong defense.
    Smoking is no longer an option for me. Smoking is just something I used to do. I control my actions, and smoking is a choice. I choose not to smoke, even if I never digest food again.
    I found a website the other day, that actually teaches you HOW TO SMOKE. I couldn't believe it. It takes you through lighting it, drawing on it, how it feels.......Holy Crap I was feeling it!!!!! Two flipping months into this, and I was feeling it, and then I knew. I had to make mental ballons and carry them with me at all times.
    Everyday is a celebration, everyday needs reminders, and everyday has its challenges. There is no one here, that can not do it. I'm not special. I'm just going to carry my own balloons.
    Just sayin,

    Gon
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/9819-mental-balloons/
     
  18. jillar

    Executive Assistant

    By jillar,


    General
    El Bandito
    Posted April 20, 2014 · IP 
     
    The below is a repost of a repost of a repost...
     
    It is a post that I have found invaluable. I posted it somewhere else today - and LB suggested it have a thread of its own....
     
    Triggers: Reminders From Your Executive Assistant 


    Original post : Kattatonic Gold/ Freedom member. 


    "It's all in your head" has developed a really bad rap in our culture. What's up with that? The power of the brain is remarkable. We should marvel and be impressed. 

    Has anyone told you that since physical withdrawal is over... get a grip... or get over it... or something like that? 

    What about patience with yourself? You've been informed that it's psychological after 2 weeks . Do you think the impulse to smoke should stop now, now, now? 

    Do you think impulses after you have quit for a while indicate you are weak? 
    Quite the contrary, actually. Your brain is working as designed. 

    Okay, listen up. Your brain is amazing. Every time you do anything, one function your brain performs is to try to save you time and prevent you from repeating past mistakes. So quickly and subconsciously, your brain scans the memory banks for similar circumstances whenever you do anything. When it finds comparable history, it compares that with what you are doing now and alerts you to differences, just like an efficient little assistant. 



    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 
    Yesterday I pulled on my day pack, went out the front door and turned left to walk up the street. Suddenly I am hit with a trigger. Why? Because I haven't turned left off my front stoop since before I quit. I quit in the winter and I have either gone out the back door to my car, or turned right to walk to the subway. Turning left means I am going to bother to walk to the grocery, which I haven't done since I quit. 

    The part of my brain that tries to save me time, let's call him the Executive Assistant (the EA), recalled past left turns from the stoop. He went down a checklist. What did she need / what did she use on previous excursions like this? Wallet? Check. Keys? Check. Bags? Check. Smokes? NOPE. "Ah, ah, ah, excuse me!" I could imagine him running up behind me yesterday as I set out and picked up pace. "You've forgotten your cigarettes! You're going to need your cigarettes when you get to the café!" (I treat myself to a special coffee when I bother to walk to the market.) 

    Remember all those times you forgot your cigarettes and kicked yourself? It was such an inconvenience when you were an active using addict. Back then, your reaction went something like this: "Memo to self. Don't forget the cigarettes!" What I'm calling the 'EA' function in your brain monitors these memos. He got the memos and he's acting on them. He got thousands of memos like that! 

    The poor guy is just trying to do his job. So I thanked my EA for trying to save me frustration, reminded him that I no longer smoke and that he should refer to the new Never Take Another Puff memo. 

    After my coffee up the street, I paused to listen to the Let's-Smoke trigger, a little different and a more uncomfortable than the Forgot-Your-Cigarettes trigger. There he was again, but this time trying to get me to actually smoke! What a guy! His reasoning? "You've eaten, walked and coffeed, you're about to shop... you are going to want a smoke before you know it and you'd always rather smoke here than while walking home. Always! Always!" 

    This guy is no dummy. I did in fact send him that memo many, many times. For heavens sake, I smoked for 25 years. The filing cabinets are full of those old memos. 

    How to teach an old dog new tricks? Well the EA in our brains can and does learn new routines all the time. We may learn slower as we age but we do still learn and adapt, especially if we do it consciously. We have to note new memos to ourselves, sometimes several times and we have to be kind to ourselves... or our ‘EAs’. The kinder and calmer you are, the more chance you have of him 'getting it' each time. So what to do in the café? 

    I said to my EA, "Thanks! I appreciate the reminder but you have to look at the newer One = All memo again. I am not going to smoke today or ever. Please remember that coffee time is no longer smoke time." 

    He will get it; I know he will. It will just take a while and a walk through all my various scenarios. He is really very, very good. He learned so well the first time -- I have to give him time to learn the new mandate. 

    Thanks for reading my ramblings. You are doing it,! It is doable! It does get better and it is worth it... wait! Make that, YOU are worth it. Yes, you are.The factor that really shows the addiction is not how hard or how easy it is to quit. What really shows the addiction is how universally easy it is to go back. One puff and the quit can go out the window.UCanQuit 
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/805-executive-assistant/
     
  19. jillar
    beacon
     
    Posted May 12, 2016 
     
    I TRIED TO CLIMB THE MOUNTAIN TODAY.
     
    I tried to climb the mountain today. As I inched my way up the path, I felt overwhelmed, so I had to turn back.
    I tried to climb the mountain today. On my journey, darkness started to fall, and I was full of fear, so I had to return to a safe place. 
    I was ready to climb the mountain today. But it was so hot outside, I thought I better stay in my nice air-conditioned house and rest up for tomorrow’s attempt. 
    I was about to climb the mountain today. But I had so many other things to do, so instead of climbing the mountain I took care of much more important tasks. I washed my car, mowed the grass and watched the big game. Today the mountain will just have to wait. 
    I was going to climb the mountain today. But as I stared at the mountain in it’s majestic beauty, I knew I stood no chance of making it to the top, so I figured why even bother trying. 
    I have forgotten about climbing the mountain today; until a friend came by and asked me what I was up to lately. I told him I was thinking about climbing that mountain some day. I went on and on about how I was going to accomplish this task.
    Finally, he said, “I just got back from climbing the mountain. For the longest time I told myself I was trying to climb the mountain but never made any progress. I almost let the dream of making it to the top die. I came up with every excuse of why I could not make it up the mountain, but never once did I give myself a reason why I could. 
    One day as I stared at the mountain and pondered, I realized that if I didn’t make an attempt at this dream all my dreams will eventually die.”
    “The next morning, I started my climb.” He continued, “It was not easy, and at times I wanted to quit. But no matter what I faced, I placed one foot in front of the other, keeping a steady pace. When the wind tried to blow me over the edge, I kept walking. When the voices inside my head screamed “stop!” I focused on my goal never letting it out of sight, and I kept moving forward. At times, I was ready to quit, but I knew I had come too far. Time and time again, I reassured myself that I was going to finish this journey. I struggled to make it to the top, but I climbed the mountain!”
    “I have to be going,” my friend said. “Tomorrow is a new day to accomplish more dreams. By the way, what are you going to do tomorrow?” 
    I looked at him, with intensity and confidence in my eyes, and said, “I have a mountain to climb.” – Gary Barnes
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/6996-i-tried-to-climb-the-mountain-today/
     
  20. jillar
    jillar
    Posted November 30 
     
     
    *A lifetime of freedom from nicotine.
    *Worldwide support from members in all phases of quitting and who know and can relate to what you may go through at any given time in your quit.
    *Tons of educational material about our addiction to nicotine. Be it by reading, watching videos or asking other members. We have it all 
     
    So what do you have to lose by becoming a member?
     
    ACT NOW and you can go into the New Year COMPLETELY SMOKE FREE! You heard that right folks. No more burn holes everywhere
     

     
     
    No more stale smoke stink on you and all your stuff
     

     
     
    AND we already told you about all the extra CASH
     

     
     
    All this and there's STILL MORE! Yep, we've saved the best for last. Quit now and enjoy better health and less colds. Better circulation, pinker gums, the list goes on and on... 
     

     
     
    So give yourself the ultimate gift this holiday season. You won't regret it 
                                              
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/14789-free-to-all-new-members-who-register/
     
     
  21. jillar
    Nancy
    Quit Date: 07/07/2013
     
    Posted December 30, 2015 · IP 
     
    Doreen and I were talking, and realized our husbands are the same age, 66.  That is about the only thing they have in common.  I am going to tell you first about my husband, Dennis, and then Doreen will be along to tell you about Tony. Hopefully there are smokers who will read this who still have the opportunity to choose which husband and father they would like to be.
     
    Dennis is a never smoker.  At 66, he still works 40 hours a week.  He enjoys golf, and boating.  He maintains our home and houseboat.  As many of you know, this past year he and his 70 year old brother totally remodeled the upstairs of our home. They took the kitchen down to the studs and rebuilt (and Dennis was still working 40 hours each week).  Dennis recently walked his oldest daughter down the aisle with pride.  He loves life and has a wonderful laugh.  He takes medicine to control blood pressure and cholesterol, but is in great health otherwise.
     
    Doreen will tell you about Tony, soon. 
     
    Doreensfree
    Quit Date: 7 /8/2013
     
    Posted December 30, 2015 · 
    I carnt post pictures, but I'm sure Tony would not want you all to see how sick he looks...
    Tony has end stage emphysema... He smoked until he physically couldn't put a cigarette in his mouth and smoke it..
    It takes all the strength and breath he has ..to just get out of bed in the morning...with my help...
    After a rest...he needs my help to wash...shave..
    Chair lift gets him downstairs...gets settled in a chair..where he stays till we have a bedtime routine.
    Emergency ambulances ,and hospital is never too far away...lung infections are almost on going..
    Doctors fight to keep pneumonia at bay...
    Because his blood doesn't retain oxygen...he needs a machine 16 hours a day....
    Sleeping with the mask on and the machine going all night is only half of it...
    Tony relies on me for everything...as sooon as he tries to move ...he is breathless...
    I have watched him the last 14 years slowly get worse ,this is a very cruel illness.
    I have shortened this thread...I could write a book...
    Tony and I don't know just how bad this will get...we live our lives on a daily basis..
    If you are out there reading this...wanting to quit...please do it now..
    I thank Nancy ....brilliant idea..
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/6446-a-tale-of-two-husbandswhich-will-you-be/
     
  22. jillar

    The First "No Thank You"

    By jillar,


    General
    Rooster
    Quit Date: 1/1/2014
     
    Posted January 9, 2015 · IP 
    Hi everyone, in preparation for a night around some smokers I wanted to write down an accomplishment from yesterday which I will be repeating as many times as necessary this evening. My first no thank you. Since I stopped smoking, I was pretty surprised at how easy it has been relative to my expectations. I had prepared for the worse, but I have realized over the last few weeks that I really hadn't been buying many and as such didn't have very many triggers. I did have one however, the offer.
     
    As I had scaled back my personal smoking, only my social smoking remained, and it was something I was happy to have remain. I was quick to jump on any offer for a quick jump outside, either at work or with friends. This I knew would be my big obstacle.
     
    Well, last night I went out to dinner with a friend (my new roommate) who smokes occasionally. Dinner was great and we had a few drinks, another common partner of smoking with me. As we left I knew what was to come, I had run through the scenario in my head to prepare and it had always ended in awkwardness. I had shared my quit with him, but out of habit and some twisted sense of generosity he offered me another out of his pocket. There they were, the pangs, the slippery devil saying, well maybe just one... the fear of missing out. But while I did feel that impulse for a second it was followed by a "No thanks, I don't anymore" and everything dissipated. No awkwardness, no real compulsion anymore, just two friends walking home in their new reality.
     
    I know this is just one win, and it will need to be repeated maybe hundreds of more time, but I immensely proud to have gotten over what for me is the big obstacle of trigger. As I had out tonight to enjoy myself at a favorite bar, listening to a friends band with a crowd of people, some of whom I've known for 3/4ths of my life and some of whom smoke, I am comforted and invigorated by this victory and the knowledge that I have all of you in my pocket, just a few clicks away, supporting me on this journey. Thank you all so much.
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/4130-the-first-no-thank-you/
     
  23. jillar
    Many if not all smokers believe that smoking relieves stress.  It doesn't and in fact causes it.  Nicotine causes your heart rate to increase, your blood pressure to rise and sends adrenaline pulsing through your veins.  This happens each time you smoke a cigarette.  It's an illusion that smoking relieves stress because as smokers, we've conditioned ourselves to believe this. 
     
    Look at it this way.  After we put out a cigarette, the average smoker starts to experience mild withdrawal after approximately twenty minutes.  Most smokers don't even realize that they're in withdrawal but start to crave another cigarette to relieve the discomforts of withdrawal.  The cravings are a result of being in mild nicotine withdrawal which causes us some discomfort, makes us feel edgy, irritable etc., so when we light up another cigarette, we relieve those withdrawal symptoms and we feel better, for around 20 minutes or so.  Then once the dose of nicotine wears off, the withdrawal process starts all over again and we continue to feed the addiction and keep the cycle going.
     
    So it's only natural for us to add 2+2 and come up with 7 because we've believed the lie that smoking relieves stress when in fact all it does is relieve the withdrawal symptoms (which are stressful) caused by smoking in the first place.  We're using the same drug to try and fix the problem that started this whole process when we became nicotine addicts.  So when things in life upset us, we automatically think that smoking will calm us down or help us cope with whatever it is that we're dealing with because that's the illusion smoking provides. 
     
    The truth is that smoking causes stress.  It's impossible that it can calm us down because of the effects it has on our heart rate, blood pressure and the release of adrenaline, which by the way is produced whenever we're experiencing a stressful situation or a period of extreme excitement.  Nicotine is causing all of this when we smoke.
     
    Stress is a normal part of life and so is feeling extremely stressed or excited.  Imagine that feeling of fight or flight (caused by the release of adrenaline which causes your blood pressure to increase, heart rate to increase etc.) as your body readies itself for whatever it is that's in front of you.  Now imagine smoking a cigarette at this time.  It can only further elevate your heart rate, blood pressure etc.  It has the opposite effect of something that can calm you or relieve stress.  Adrenaline is awesome.  It's what makes us survive and thrive at certain things.  But relieve stress or calm us down?  Impossible.
     
    Once we stop smoking we're better equipped to deal with life and all the joys, pleasures, boredom and stress that it brings.  Smoking actually ruins our peaceful moments in life by causing our adrenal glands to prepare us for "fight or flight" and escalates the stressful times by doing the same. 
     
    When we smoke, are we ever really experiencing all that life has to offer us?  Are we even capable of living in the "Now" and protecting our much needed down time to recharge?  Are we able to meditate or stop the chatter or chaos that so often fills our minds and consumes our thoughts?  Can we experience the calming effects of a still mind and body?
     
    The other evening it was around 4°F with a wind chill of -10°F.  The moon was giving off just enough light that I could see the trees and sky through my windows.  I was laying on the couch in front of the windows and was completely relaxed. It was quiet and as I released all of the stresses, to-do-lists and thoughts of what tomorrow might bring; my mind was still and quiet.  The chatter was gone as there would be time for all that later.  But for those 30 minutes, my mind was still and all the stressful thoughts were gone.  This allowed my body to relax and just enjoy "The Now" for there will never, ever be another moment exactly the same.  I want to experience all of those "Now" moments that I can.
     
    Smoking and constant withdrawal would have never allowed me to experience this inner state of peace and quiet.  Never again will smoking take away these much needed quiet times that allow me to grow and be the best that I can be for myself and my daughter for without her, I cannot experience all that life has for me, just for Now.
     
    I Smoke Because I Like Smoking
    This video discusses how people who often say the smoke because they like smoking can come to realize that they really smoke because they don't like not smoking.
     
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nCkt_ajgTQE
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/4504-is-smoking-stopping-you-from-experiencing-all-that-life-has-to-offer-marylandquitter/
     
  24. jillar

    The Secret

    By jillar,


    General
    cpk
    Quit Date: 02/04/2015
     
     
    Posted March 21, 2015 
     
    What will I do today?
     
    There's a smorgesbord of things ...
    Because it's officially Spring
    and
    I don't have to think about not smoking every minute.
     
    This is real freedom.   (The Secret)
    I don't have to white-knuckle it.
    Just apply light attention. Vigilant, but not heavy-handed.
     
    I have earned this freedom.  But this day? ~~~ it's a gift.
    How many days I threw away to smoking ~~~ So many!
    (shameful)
    But not today. :wub:
    I feel happy. (Birds chirping) That's all. Easy-peasy.
     
    Happy Today to all.
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/4838-the-secret/
     
  25. jillar

    Did The Penny Drop For You?

    By jillar,


    General
    Jonny5
    Posted April 24, 2014 · IP 
     
    I remember that I was going through the motions, telling myself that I wasn't giving up anything etc etc, just like Allen Carr told me.  and I remember thinking , ok yeh, I can buy into this, I can look at things from a more positive perspective.  I was prepared to follow the don't smoke instructions, but I did suspect Allen Carr was just trying to point out the obvious, and that made me feel a little patronised, but he was telling the truth, don't smoke and you are a non smoker.. well yeh of course.
     
    I had already decided that I was going to see this thing through, I wasn't going to give in this time.
     
    but the penny didn't drop until day 18 for me.  I remember clearly.  I was sat in this same chair that I am now.  I was in the foulest of moods, I was snapping at my wife for no reason, it was not like me at all.
     
    I stood up and said to her, " I'm sorry, I'm being an A hole to you."  she said "it's fine, you are going through a hard time quitting."
     
    I was embarrassed and didn't like the situation one bit.  And I said to her "I'm going to stop being a moaning b**tard right this minute, because I'm fed up of being that guy.
     
    and in an instant I wasn't that guy any more.  I did have control over me. and over how I was reacting to quitting smoking. I believe part of me had still felt I was giving up something before that moment.
     
    I was still experiencing craves quite badly on that day, but right after the conversation with my wife, I stood up and faced one of the craves.  and I actually said out loud, come on then, do your worst, give me your best shot, because I'm not going to smoke, so go ahead and punish me. kill me, or whatever it is that you've been threatening.
     
    of course nothing happened.  nothing does happen.  but the moment I realise that, is the moment that everything happened.  I was free.  my tormentor had no weaponry that could harm me ever again, it was all just fear.
     
    that was the day I started saying to myself and others, "what's the worst thing that could happen if you don't smoke?"
     
    and it was the day that I realised that Allen Carr was a genius, the simplicity of his method blew away all of the rubbish that I had accumulated over the years, the rubbish that stood in the way of my path to freedom.
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/952-did-the-penny-drop-for-you/
     

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QuitTrain®, a quit smoking support community, was created by former smokers who have a deep desire to help people quit smoking and to help keep those quits intact.  This place should be a safe haven to escape the daily grind and focus on protecting our quits.  We don't believe that there is a "one size fits all" approach when it comes to quitting smoking.  Each of us has our own unique set of circumstances which contributes to how we go about quitting and more importantly, how we keep our quits.

 

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