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Death In The West - The Marlboro Story (Full Documentary)

jillar

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  1. jillar

    Removing the Fear of Relapse

    By jillar,


    General
    Jonny5
    Quit Date: 2011-12-21
    Posted April 10, 2014 
     
    I'm not afraid of relapse one single bit. It ain't ever gonna happen.

    Some of you are. And there's one huge reason for that....

    You have not closed the doors on your smoking past and evolved into a never again smoker, you have a lingering belief that smoking does give you some benefits and are abstaining through many methods. 

    Abstainance looks like my quit but it is fundamentally different. 

    There is no reason I would smoke ever and I hate smoke being anywhere near me. I am repulsed by the poisonous stench.

    Abstainance is going without what you want.

    You can abstain all your life, but it will never be the same as the true desire to never smoke again, and by definition it is never going to be as comfortable.

    You must discect your quitting mindset and remove any weaknesses to make it relapse proof.

    Seriously you have to remove all justifications. Including death of a child. Murder of a spouse. Terrible awful situations that you may face, and you must know that you would not find smoking to be a comfort.

    Then, like me, you will be forever free.

    This is the power and strength behind NOPE...it is not just a bashing word from the hardcore ex smoking police, it is the source of their quit strength.
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/490-removing-the-fear-of-relapse/
     
  2. jillar

    Who's in Charge?

    By jillar,


    General
    cpk
    Quit Date: 02/04/2015
     
    Posted March 28, 2015 · IP 
    When you were a smoker trying to quit did you sometimes wish you could buy "just one"?
     
    In my town a few stores used to sell single cigarettes. The singles they sold were stinky and stale and expensive, and it was like the tobacco industry was laughing in your face like "gotcha!" you will even buy a stale cigarette. What's next?, picking butts up out of the gutter?
     
    Sure, you can bum one. But then when you get home, and it's late, and the demon's awake? Then who's in charge?
     
    When you relapsed, do you remember thinking, "I wish I didn't have to buy a whole pack... I only wanted one, or two." ?
     
    When you relapsed, do you remember thinking, "I just bought this pack today and it's full. I'll quit tomorrow..." ?
     
    When you relapsed, did you find a crushed up cigarette pack in a pocket, with one or two left ? Do you remember your jolt of pleasure?
     
    The tobacco industry knows. It knows it's in charge because you are the addict.
     
    That pack of 20 -- those industry devils must have had it figured out --- the average amount in a day's supply for the addict. A smoke or a couple every hour, just enough to keep the fire stoked...
     
    Hell, if smokes were sold as singles...you might have to work harder to get from one smoke to the next...there might be time...to THINK.
     
    The tobacco industry doesn't want thinking smokers on its hands. It wants addicts.
     
    It's a powerful thing to quit. It's a powerful thing to wake up in the morning and feel deep down inside, "I'm in charge. I drive the bus. I say what I do with my time today. I spend money on things I like today. I am a free person today."
     
    The tobacco industry devils aren't going anywhere. They are at the edge of the parking lot, with their brass knuckles on, blowing smoke downwind, towards you. They want you addicted. They don't want to politely offer you "just one" --- they want you addicted to one times a billion+. When you're dead they will step over your body and stalk the next victim.
     
    So, who's in charge of YOUR WORLD today???
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/4925-whos-in-charge/
     
  3. jillar

    Anxiety Antidote

    By jillar,


    General
    cpk
    Quit Date: 02/04/2015
     
    Posted May 17, 2015 · IP 
     
    It has taken me awhile to figure out that the anxiety I have been experiencing since week 6 of my quit (now in week 15) is not directly related to quitting.
     
    Not smoking is the peaceful part of my life.
     
    The anxiety was there before I quit. I probably used smoking to try to keep the anxiety in check. I don't recall having "anxiety attacks" when I smoked.
     
    I have opted to use natural supplements, which are helping. This weekend I picked up a workbook on using DBT (Dialectical Behavior Therapy) to quell anxiety through cognitive and emotional restructuring --- that is, simply put, training my mind to not be anxious. I need to reprogram the software in my brain.
     
    I had gotten in the habit of being anxious. I now need to learn how to do life in a new way.
     
    I know that people sometimes relapse because they find they are more anxious not smoking and feel they can't cope. They think it is because they miss smoking. This was me in the past, before I joined QT and got educated. I never even considered that my anxiety had nothing to do with quitting smoking.  I used smoking to try to calm myself, but that probably made everything worse! I certainly felt like a physical wreck, and it's pretty hard to cope when you have smoking related headaches, respiratory distress, fatigue and a host of other physical problems. Now I have none of these physical problems.
     
    The good people on this site prodded me a bit to look closer, and to observe what was going on with my life. That is the beauty of QT...that quitters know the journey of self-discovery takes time and patience. (I especially remember Tracey suggesting this in a very gentle way.)
     
    I was a little bummed out to realize this state of being anxious was something lurking beneath my smoking addiction. However, accepting that this is something I have to work on is far better than endlessly relapsing, which is very bad for self confidence.
     
    Strength to strength. I think I read that somewhere on this site. That's how I see the non smoking journey. Moving forward, growing, and evolving. Saying n.o.p.e. is the first step.
     
    Lurkers who may be reading this...there is great HOPE --- and the promise that you will never again have to experience a disappointing relapse.
     
    I know I was like many...feeling scared to try to quit again, just thinking it would end in relapse.
     
    There is a way...to never, never, never relapse again, and to forever embrace the freedom of not smoking. The way can be found right here, right now, on QT.
     
    QT helped me to see I never again have to think about relapse because I have the skills now to be a nonsmoker for life. I have freedom from smoking forever
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/5348-anxiety-antidote/
     
  4. jillar

    The Guadalupe River

    By jillar,


    General
    This post was written by a member of another forum by the name of jwg and brought over to preserve it. And although I never knew him his ability to write about his addiction and his approach to dying spoke to me. RIP jwg.....
     
     
    A lazy Texas river spanning form Kerr county Texas to the San Antonio bay on the Gulf of Mexico.  If you ever need to find a place to relax enjoy the sunshine while refreshing from the hot Texas sun, nothing beats a lazy day tubing down the slow winding of deep greens and blue. Some place your arm able to reach down and feel the stones polished by the millenniums. Hiding secrets of the Alamo and days gone by. A sacred place, where no worries in the world can follow, No troubles from work are allowed to enter, only you and your desire to be at peace can break the waters edge.
     
    In my resent ventures over this past summer I had the opportunity to experience the river , its majesty and glory , Not only was I with the river I was with the finest people in the world to share the experience. By day floating lazily carefree and by night telling stories lounging about the cabin or sitting under the stars on the porch, cooking out burgers some night or fajita’s..
     
     
    I often think of that trip and the fun we all had, to go back in time , even in memory can be so nice . Some days we would float solo or holding hands keeping close together. other days we banded are pack together by twine and traveled the river as one , like a Robin Hood and his merry men , or maybe Tom Sawyer and some of his boy hood chums.
     
    One particular day we were going solo , but I lashed the tube with the cooler to my rig
    6 hours or so , surly you need some sort of refreshment and maybe even pull up on to  a clear shore line for  a bite to eat.. And so we did. After lunch two of are young explores
    Decided to forgo the tubes, swim a bit and comb the bottom of the river for secret hidden treasures,, Lost sunglass or the mother load a Iphone or other such valuable loot.
     
    Now with no use for there tubes , the young explores piled them on top of the cooler . So there I was, in my tube tied to a stack of three tubes and a cooler. To which the wind had greater strength to control then the  slow easiness of the river current.
    Some times I would find the wind speeding me along , while others the wind dragging me back and my group of merry band of men flowing down the river far in front of me.
     
    While still enjoying the river the ride and the scenery I really had no control of the speed of my travel , to which side of the river I would coast. Sometimes the wind would bring me in to the tree line . Catching me on limbs and others casting me out into the deeper waters. Basicly I was at the mercy of powers much greater then myself..
     
     
    As history repeats itself ,, this is where I find myself once more, only today laying in my hospital bed.
    With each  day that passes more tubes are added to my burden, and now with each tube the wind carries me faster down the river then we could have ever imagined.
     
    Just a few hundred yards back the option of chemo loomed in the air to slow the winds and the current giving me more time to enjoy the river, but now once  more due to powers beyond my control I find myself helpless. My illness grows faster then can be controlled.
     
    I am at peace, I am comfortable. I am in my tube enjoying every last minute of my ride
    Down the Guadalupe
     
    I can not see the end to the river nor do I look forward to its end..
     
    I have my friends , I have my family , I have you all , and I have the love of a beautiful women , my angel, my everything to comfort and care for me
     
    I love you all
     
     
    And will to my best keep you posted
     
     
    In the mean time
     
    Don’t put things in your mouth and light them on fire !!
  5. jillar
    Nancy
    Quit Date: 07/07/2013
     
    Posted December 30, 2015 · IP 
     
    Doreen and I were talking, and realized our husbands are the same age, 66.  That is about the only thing they have in common.  I am going to tell you first about my husband, Dennis, and then Doreen will be along to tell you about Tony. Hopefully there are smokers who will read this who still have the opportunity to choose which husband and father they would like to be.
     
    Dennis is a never smoker.  At 66, he still works 40 hours a week.  He enjoys golf, and boating.  He maintains our home and houseboat.  As many of you know, this past year he and his 70 year old brother totally remodeled the upstairs of our home. They took the kitchen down to the studs and rebuilt (and Dennis was still working 40 hours each week).  Dennis recently walked his oldest daughter down the aisle with pride.  He loves life and has a wonderful laugh.  He takes medicine to control blood pressure and cholesterol, but is in great health otherwise.
     
    Doreen will tell you about Tony, soon. 
     
    Doreensfree
    Quit Date: 7 /8/2013
     
    Posted December 30, 2015 · 
    I carnt post pictures, but I'm sure Tony would not want you all to see how sick he looks...
    Tony has end stage emphysema... He smoked until he physically couldn't put a cigarette in his mouth and smoke it..
    It takes all the strength and breath he has ..to just get out of bed in the morning...with my help...
    After a rest...he needs my help to wash...shave..
    Chair lift gets him downstairs...gets settled in a chair..where he stays till we have a bedtime routine.
    Emergency ambulances ,and hospital is never too far away...lung infections are almost on going..
    Doctors fight to keep pneumonia at bay...
    Because his blood doesn't retain oxygen...he needs a machine 16 hours a day....
    Sleeping with the mask on and the machine going all night is only half of it...
    Tony relies on me for everything...as sooon as he tries to move ...he is breathless...
    I have watched him the last 14 years slowly get worse ,this is a very cruel illness.
    I have shortened this thread...I could write a book...
    Tony and I don't know just how bad this will get...we live our lives on a daily basis..
    If you are out there reading this...wanting to quit...please do it now..
    I thank Nancy ....brilliant idea..
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/6446-a-tale-of-two-husbandswhich-will-you-be/
     
  6. jillar

    Thoughts on Triggers

    By jillar,


    General
    Still winning
    Quit Date: 12th March 2014
     
    Posted October 29, 2015 
     
    It's been a while since I did a post as I don't ever want to take away from newer quits but I see a lot of triggers going around and some jumping off's. My way of speaking (writing) is to explain my experience and hopefully people can relate, or not and that's good if they can share their experience instead. Makes it much broader.  I also have no intention of saying in one paragraph what can be said in 20, I ramble  .
     
    So a trigger is simply your brain remembering "hey, we used to smoke now". I recently bumped a post called the Executive assistant, it's a great read! That's such a powerful realization to know that it is simply a thought and in reality, we have many thoughts within a day, some good some not. So the fact that I and others ran scared of quitting or staying quit (relapse queens take a bow!) was mainly due to the fear that I would always feel that I was missing something - once I found this support I quickly realized the thoughts would fade and it was worth holding on for the peace of mind later. So yes, at times it was uncomfortable mentally, but I never physically hurt, on the contrary, I actually physically started healing, we all do. I still love the stats about recovery times. Only 72 hours to get nicotine out is so fabulous really when you think of it, simply years of stuffing it in there and all gone in 3 days! I digress though. 
     
    It often took me by surprise when a smoking thought would take a hold of my brain, what we refer to as romancing the smoke. I did quickly learn that I could distract my brain quite easily though. if the trigger was simply a thought, another thought could replace it. If the trigger was simply remembering we would smoke here, then a new and healthier habit would soon get rid of the trigger or I could simply answer the thought with "we don't do that anymore". I heard it described as a tool box and I like that analogy. A toolbox of ways to outwit our own thoughts. In any other scenario this might sound like we have a screw loose (Jury's out on some of us!) but actually it's quite sane.  Get a plan of what you will do when you have your triggers and moving past it becomes easier. 
     
    We berate ourselves when we're past the initial couple of weeks for still getting triggers. I wonder why we anticipate we should be over it so quickly? I've read powerful lines like quitting is a journey not an event, that makes sense. A change of season trigger is not nearly the same as week 1 unless you give it lots of head space, so don't do that. If you're finding yourself romancing, talk/post/pm someone, smoking is a lie and it never was the answer to any of life's problems.  Reading up and educating yourself on how addiction works means you start to realize it's all a choice. That's where the answer is on triggers for me. If I "choose" to throw myself off the quit train, I will only have to start again, today or years later with more damage, may as well "get er done" today. I see others who continue to smoke and kid themselves. I've seen that journey on family ahead of me and trust me, it doesn't bear thinking about and I choose not to dwell on others who can't get real about this.
     
    So if ever a smoking thought flits through my mind now, it's easy to bat it away, like swatting a fly out of your face really. No it's nothing like the early thoughts. Actually I'll say that used to really worry me when 5 year veteran quitters said they still thought about smoking! Those people are abstaining, not quitting, there is a strong difference!  The reason I think is I embraced every trigger (holiday/seasonal/milestones) and faced it down. It wasn't always an elegant face down. I still feel like I missed a trick not buying shares in a tissue company! But the triggers do all get faced if you want to be free and it's perfectly reasonable to feel mentally on edge sometimes, non smokers get that! Non smokers have stress without smoking. They go drinking without smoking too, if they choose too.  
     
    "Choice"...isn't life all about choices. Quitting smoking is a good choice. Talking about struggling is another great choice, use the support here. We're here by choice, to help those who want it.
     
    So probably this whole post could have just been - Triggers are just thoughts of we could smoke here. but we don't smoke, so nope.
     
    However my inane drivel is far more fun and has filled your day with love and light I'm sure  :wub:  .
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/6195-thoughts-on-triggers/
     
     
  7. jillar

    COPD and Smoking

    By jillar,


    General
    jillar
    Quit Date: May 29, 2016
     
    Posted May 28
     
    As many of you know I was officially diagnosed with severe emphysema and COPD after I had respiratory failure in January of 2020. Most of you also know that for years I was struggling with breathing issues that I was told was asthma. In the two years leading up to my respiratory failure I went from 110 pounds on a 5'5" frame to just 79 when I was admitted into the ICU. My prognosis at that time was pretty grim, get better or go home on hospice. But either way I was also going home on oxygen. Since then I have put most of the weight back on and continue to feel myself get stronger each day. So then what's the point of this post you may be asking and its this....
    I found a great group for people with COPD on Facebook which is ironic because I never used Facebook pre pandemic but the group is awesome. So many people that can relate and answer the many questions those of us newly diagnosed have. Much like our community does. 
    Here's the sad part, I read post after post from members of that group still smoking. Some are on oxygen and still smoke!  I of course pass our site on to them and I hope they find their way here. Its just really sad to see. There's even a few who's Drs have refused certain procedures because they're smoking. Life saving procedures too I might add.
    COPD is a progressive disease with no known cure. It can be slowed with proper medications and quitting smoking. Sadly we can have it for years and not even know it until we get an exacerbation. Mine was thought to be asthma. 
    My day consists of trying to keep my 50' oxygen tubing out of the walkways and from getting caught in the doors. I'm embarrassed to go anywhere because people will be whispering things like "that's what happens when you smoke" etc. My poor dog and cat also have to dodge it while I'm walking down the hall to feed them. Its no way to live.
    I'm not looking for any sympathy I just want to put a brutal face to this terrible addiction in the hopes it helps someone quit or keep their quit.....
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/15648-copd-and-smoking/
     
  8. jillar
    babs609
    Quit Date: 07/13/2012
     
    Posted March 5, 2015 
     
    I am so looking forward to Spring...and as much as I complain about winter and wishing I lived in a more Babs friendly climate..I love Spring Fever!  It's a feeling that those who live in milder climates don't experience.  Seeing colors come to life, the birds singing a lovely tune at 6:00 am, the sound of lawnmowers, the smell of rain and fresh cut grass.....oh , i could go on and on!!! 
     
    With this change of seasons, for many...comes triggers!  Many of you are are facing Spring for the first time as a non smoker and you may experience some restlessness in response to these milestones. For example, even though you are enjoying breathing in fresh air as you sit out in your yard on a nice sunny spring day...your addict will remember you sitting outside with a cigarette...associating the feeling of peace and tranquility with the cigarette, rather than just the feeling of being there...enjoying the moment.
     
    That being said....let's focus on what you are looking forward to this Spring as a non-smoker....
     
    Even though this July will be 3 years since I quit...I am still looking forward to going on a hike.  I love hiking but as a smoker I would have to stop every 100 feet and breathe...and of course...after I would catch my breath..I would smoke.  The first year I quit smoking..it was easier.  Last year, easier yet!  I can't wait to see how far I can go this year!! 
     
    I also look forward to keeping up with my 2.5 year old granddaughter on the playground and not be out of breath. 
     
    What are you looking forward to....as a non smoker in the next few months??
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/4679-so-lets-have-that-chat-about-change-of-seasons/
     
  9. jillar

    The best things about not smoking

    By jillar,


    General
    larklibby
    Quit Date: 8th March 2015
     
    Posted April 18, 2015 · IP 
     
    For me, the best things about not smoking, becoming a non smoker, are the small things. I have never been driven by 'how bad' smoking is for your health, of course, clearly, smoking is terrible for your well being. Somehow, my brain had learned to navigate around that fact, because of the nicotine, the drug; It was dismissed - 'it won't happen to me' attitude. So finding a driving factor for my quit has never been clear cut, until one day I had a moment of clarity.

    The day I threw away smoking out of my life, the day before I found this wonderful website, I saw sense. I had been thinking about quitting for about a month, but as ever with a quit 'it was never the right time'. So I had been soul searching for a reason that I know would help me achieve the quit. Of course I had the normal reasons: financial, health and 'you ain't getting any younger!' And then after 25 years of smoking, it hit me, it was obvious. I realised that nicotine had control over me.

    I was in every sense a 'slave' to a drug. A junkie. 

    My day would be structured around smoking. Did I have enough smokes. When I would smoke. Do I have enough smokes for tomorrow? All this would go through my head first thing in the morning, sometimes even before bed the night before. It seemed normal.

    To not have that constraint on my thoughts and movements really is an indescribable euphoria. It's finding inner freedom, shaking off a dependency that gave me nothing. All the things I thought I couldn't do if I stopped smoking, I can, and better: Socialise, be creative, and concentrate. 

    Yes the first two weeks were a bastard nightmare, but, I would do it again in a blink of an eye if I knew it would get me to where I am now. 

    Even after just a month, I feel brilliant. A million times better than I did after having a smoke. I still have a journey I know, however whenever I now get the urge to smoke, I visualise a prison cell in my head, and say to myself if I smoke again I will be walking back into that cell. It works, it works for me - I will never want to lose this feeling I have.

    So anybody thinking about stopping smoking, not only look at the health and financial aspects of smoking, but see it as taking back control of your life, take the helm back - it's yours. 
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/5141-the-best-things-about-not-smoking/
     
  10. jillar

    It's your choice

    By jillar,


    General
    On 8/4/2015 at 10:57 AM, Tiffany said:
     
    Read this. Line by line. Think about it. Feel it.
     
     
    Picture yourself a second or two after you stub out that quit-breaking cigarette. The one that you just had to have because the craving was so strong you couldn't hold out any longer, when that voice inside you was saying.. "Go on, life sucks, you may as well smoke a cig.. y'know for your nerves.." or the other one.. "you've got this beat now.. you are in control.. you can have one just now and again.. go on have one for old time's sake.." So you bum a cigarette, and smoke it and in 2 and 1/2 minutes, you stub it out.
    Now what. Your mouth feels like crap. Your lungs are tightening up. You managed to stifle the coughs .. but barely. You began to squint again because the smoke hurt your eyes. and your fingers and clothes smell again. You either want to throw up, grab some mouthwash, take a shower, or have another.. maybe buy a pack.
    But then you realize what you've just done. After all those times when you said you were going to quit, and then when you finally did, and your family and friends were so happy for you - but not exactly over the moon, because after all they've been hopeful before only to see you relapse - all that enthusiasm is now smashed to pieces on the floor. And all the pressure that drove you to grab that cigarette in the first place - it's all still there. Nothing has changed, except now you've added one more problem: you just blew it.
    And then you realize what you've really done. You had invested days, maybe weeks and months, in this quit. You had made a great decision, one of the few things you really and truly felt proud of in your life, and you just blew it. You just blew the quit that you swore to yourself was the last one. You were so positive, so motivated, and encouraged, you were really on top of it, ahead of the game for once, you had taken control of your life and it felt like a whole new beginning.. and you just blew it.
    You look at that stub in the ashtray. The grey ash and the brown edge to the burnt paper, and the tar stain on the end of filter. You remember the thousands of cigarettes you have stubbed out and think about the tar that came into your lungs as smoke. And you think if smoking that one cigarette was worth it. Nothing's better. You feel a little dizzy now as the nicotine hits your body, even a little nauseous - certainly don't feel the pleasure that you remember the adverts and billboards were promoting during your early years as a smoker. In fact it's hard to remember any time when you felt that pleasure.. just another tobacco company lie.. They helped you to become an addict the first time, but when you smoked that cigarette after you quit.. well that was a whole new decision. You made that one all by yourself - there's no pointing fingers now, you know that cigarettes kill, so when you lit that one cigarette, the choice to smoke was all yours - no-one else to blame. And you just blew it.
    It wasn't worth it.. time after time the slippers' and relapsers' lament how they feel like crap, how ashamed they are, how they have lost confidence and hope, how they hate themselves, how much it hurts, how depressed and they cry and hide and cry some more. And now you are one of them.. the quit losers. Lost in the wilderness, not quite a smoker.. yet and not sure you are a quitter, searching for some dignity, some self-respect out of this. All because of that one cigarette. Because you blew it.
    WITH JUST ONE
    One Puff
    One Cigarette
    One Pack
    One Carton.
     
     
    You know what it feels like to fail already. Now feel what it's like to succeed.
     
    Your choice.
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/5780-michelledoesntsmoke/
     
  11. jillar

    Why is it so hard to quit smoking?

    By jillar,


    General
    Nancy
    Quit Date: 07/07/2013
     
    Posted March 25, 2016 
    From the American Cancer Society...
     
    Why is it so hard to quit smoking?
    Mark Twain said, “Quitting smoking is easy. I’ve done it a thousand times.” Maybe you’ve tried to quit, too. Why is quitting and staying quit hard for so many people? The answer is mainly nicotine.
    Nicotine
    Nicotine is a drug found naturally in tobacco, which is as addictive as heroin or cocaine. Over time, a person becomes physically dependent on and emotionally addicted to nicotine. This physical dependence causes unpleasant withdrawal symptoms when you try to quit. The emotional and mental dependence (addiction) make it hard to stay away from nicotine after you quit. Studies have shown that to quit and stay quit, smokers must deal with both the physical and mental dependence.
    How nicotine gets in, where it goes, and how long it stays
    When you inhale smoke, nicotine is carried deep into your lungs. There it’s quickly absorbed into the bloodstream and carried, along with the carbon monoxide and other toxins, to every part of your body. In fact, nicotine inhaled in cigarette smoke reaches the brain faster than drugs that enter the body through a vein (intravenously or IV).
    Nicotine affects many parts of your body, including your heart and blood vessels, your hormones, the way your body uses food (your metabolism), and your brain. Nicotine can be found in breast milk and even in the cervical mucus of female smokers. During pregnancy, nicotine crosses the placenta and has been found in amniotic fluid and the umbilical cord blood of newborn infants.
    Different factors affect how long it takes the body to remove nicotine and its by-products. In most cases, regular smokers will still have nicotine and/or its by-products, such as cotinine, in their bodies for about 3 to 4 days after stopping.
    How nicotine hooks smokers
    Nicotine causes pleasant feelings and distracts the smoker from unpleasant feelings. This makes the smoker want to smoke again. Nicotine also acts as a kind of depressant by interfering with the flow of information between nerve cells. Smokers tend to smoke more cigarettes as the nervous system adapts to nicotine. This, in turn, increases the amount of nicotine in the smoker’s blood.
    Over time, the smoker develops a tolerance to nicotine. Tolerance means that it takes more nicotine to get the same effect that the smoker used to get from smaller amounts. This leads to an increase in smoking. At some point, the smoker reaches a certain nicotine level and then keeps smoking to keep the level of nicotine within a comfortable range.
    When a person finishes a cigarette, the nicotine level in the body starts to drop, going lower and lower. The pleasant feelings wear off, and the smoker notices wanting a smoke. If smoking is postponed, the smoker may start to feel irritated and edgy. Usually it doesn’t reach the point of serious withdrawal symptoms, but the smoker gets more uncomfortable over time. When the person smokes a cigarette, the unpleasant feelings fade, and the cycle continues.
    Nicotine withdrawal symptoms can lead quitters back to smoking
    When smokers try to cut back or quit, the lack of nicotine leads to withdrawal symptoms. Withdrawal is both physical and mental. Physically, the body reacts to the absence of nicotine. Mentally, the smoker is faced with giving up a habit, which calls for a major change in behavior. Emotionally, the smoker may feel like they’ve lost their best friend. All of these factors must be addressed for the quitting process to work.
    Those who have smoked regularly for a few weeks or longer will have withdrawal symptoms if they suddenly stop using tobacco or greatly reduce the amount they smoke. Symptoms usually start within a few hours of the last cigarette and peak about 2 to 3 days later when most of the nicotine and its by-products are out of the body. Withdrawal symptoms can last for a few days to up to several weeks. They will get better every day that you stay smoke-free.
    Withdrawal symptoms can include any of the following:
    Dizziness (which may last 1 to 2 days after quitting)
    Depression
    Feelings of frustration, impatience, and anger
    Anxiety
    Irritability
    Sleep disturbances, including having trouble falling asleep and staying asleep, and having bad dreams or even nightmares
    Trouble concentrating
    Restlessness or boredom
    Headaches
    Tiredness
    Increased appetite
    Weight gain
    Constipation and gas
    Cough, dry mouth, sore throat, and nasal drip
    Chest tightness
    Slower heart rate
    These symptoms can make the smoker start smoking again to boost blood levels of nicotine until the symptoms go away. (For information on coping with withdrawal, see the section called “Dealing with smoking withdrawal.”)
    Other substances in cigarette smoke
    There is some evidence that other chemicals in cigarette smoke may act with nicotine to make it harder to quit smoking. The effects of smoking on monoamine oxidase (a brain chemical) is still being studied. For some people, withdrawing from smoking causes more severe mood problems, which can result in worse cravings and more trouble staying quit.
    Smoking affects other medicines
    Smoking also makes your body get rid of some drugs faster than usual. When you quit smoking, it may change the levels of these drugs. Though it’s not truly withdrawal, this change can cause problems and add to the discomfort of quitting. Ask your doctor if any medicines you take need to be checked or changed after you quit.
    Last Medical Review: 02/06/2014
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/6836-why-is-it-so-hard-to-quit-smoking/
     
  12. jillar

    I'm A Quitter

    By jillar,


    Blogs
    My husband loves to tell anyone who will listen that I'm a quitter. I "quit" my twenty year professional cleaning service ( actually the high costs of Workers comp in the state at the time forced me to close). 
    I quit my ice cream truck business (because it sucked watching everyone having a good time while I was out putting two steps forward and ending up one step back).
    I quit throwing shingles to him up on the roof ( that one was his own fault for being a jerk on the roof). 
    And then I quit smoking...
    I've quit quitting many a time and never really called them relapses because quite honestly I never quit to begin with. I simply abstained for a while.
    I really had to work myself up to just doing it. I gave myself little pep talks for months leading up to my forever quit. Saying things like "all good(?) things must come to an end". Then I would remind myself of all the things I had outgrown and convinced myself that smoking would soon be one of them.
    So on Sunday May 29, 2016 around 5:00 pm I smoked the last cigarette in my pack and that was that. Or so I thought.....
    Over the next five or so hours I proceeded to smoke every butt in my ashtrays. You see, I didn't tell anyone I quit just in case I failed so I hadn't cleaned and put away the ashtrays. So on Sunday May 29, 2016 at 10:15 pm I quit. 
    It wasn't always easy and some days were downright brutal for me but most of that was my own darn fault. I didn't embrace the beauty in being a quitter. I was too busy feeling sorry for myself for not " getting" to smoke like everyone else could. 
    Looking back now i truly believe your mindset is what is going to dictate how hard or how easy your quit will be. Choose easy....
  13. jillar

    Mindset Really Is Everything

    By jillar,


    General
    babs609
    Quit Date: 07/13/2012
     
     
    Posted August 23, 2014 · IP 
    There have been discussions recently about NOPE and how it doesn't resonate well with some.  I understand that feeling.  When I was fresh in my quit the first few months, I wanted to believe those that have quit before me.  I wanted their sense of peacefulness and satisfaction with life without the cigarette.  I just couldn't imagine it and the daily restlessness that was occurring made it even more difficult to wrap my brain around it.  
    I tend to have a scientific mind.  I want proof of things.  I had a hard time just saying NOPE...
     
    But one thing I knew.  These people weren't stronger than me.  They weren't special.  I was not more addicted nor was my circumstances any more unique than theirs.  I have had tough times in my life..just like them.  So, I decided....I am just going to "go with it".  I will put all my faith in NOPE (blind faith).  I will eat, sleep, drink, laugh, and walk NOPE.  ( a few times when I craved, I would actually go for a walk and with each step, over and over I would chant the letters N.O.P.E, not one puff ever...smoking is not an option.  Over and over...over and over....(took a peek; no--still unsettled, still not feeling it)  so...continue...NOPE, NOPE, NOPE, NOPE
     
    Finally finally finally....around the 6th month..i started to really feel it.  I got it. 
    Doesn't mean I always felt it...the first year was a struggle at times...I'm not gonna lie...but once i "got it"  I knew I would "get it"  again.
     
    Just got back from a vacation.  I am more than 2 years quit.  Vacation was peaceful and relaxing...sometimes too peaceful and boring at times....those were the times i would have filled the void with a smoke.  Especially because the person I was with smokes like a chimney and was constantly out on the balcony puffing away.  My cravings this past week were incredible.  No weaker than they were 2 years ago.  The difference is...I know better.  I know it's a trick...I know it will pass...and I know I will be a happier, healthier person because of it.
     
    So.....I went for a lot of runs to burn off that energy.  It worked...I came back a non smoker...and 3 pounds lighter! 
     
    So you see.....it matters not how long you are quit.  There are people who have quit for 15 or 20 years who still want a cigarette at times....and some of them..because they are not educated about nicotine addiction...they actually stayed quit "in spite of" themselves and their thinking.  They think they gave something up.  When in reality, they escaped. I am grateful I am not one of those people.  Could you imagine refraining from doing something you desperately want to do for 20 years...day in and day out??  no....not me..and if that was the case....I would never have quit smoking.  I would have resolved to stay a smoker for life.
     
    It really is simple...it really is easy...and NOPE is really truly the way for me.  It really is.
     
    Easy peasy
     

     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/2399-mindset-really-is-everything/
     
  14. jillar

    The Secret

    By jillar,


    General
    cpk
    Quit Date: 02/04/2015
     
     
    Posted March 21, 2015 
     
    What will I do today?
     
    There's a smorgesbord of things ...
    Because it's officially Spring
    and
    I don't have to think about not smoking every minute.
     
    This is real freedom.   (The Secret)
    I don't have to white-knuckle it.
    Just apply light attention. Vigilant, but not heavy-handed.
     
    I have earned this freedom.  But this day? ~~~ it's a gift.
    How many days I threw away to smoking ~~~ So many!
    (shameful)
    But not today. :wub:
    I feel happy. (Birds chirping) That's all. Easy-peasy.
     
    Happy Today to all.
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/4838-the-secret/
     
  15. jillar

    Rewarding Yourself For Not Smoking

    By jillar,


    General
    Colleen
    Quit Date: 6/2/13
     
    Posted June 16, 2015 
     
    How do you reward yourself for not smoking?  It's okay to spend some of that money you saved from not smoking.  In the very beginning of my quit, I rewarded myself quite a bit because it was important to me.  Nothing extravagant really.  When I hit a year quit, I purchased a pair of spin shoes.  
     
    Two years quit now, my how time flies.  I have a Jawbone UP and have had to send it back more than once.  They send a new one, no questions asked over and over.  Guess they are having problems lol.  Have been really getting tired of it all and had been thinking about upgrading.  So, I order online my two year reward this morning and it already arrived somehow tonight, a Garmin Vivosmart and a HRM.
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/5499-rewarding-yourself-for-not-smoking/
     
  16. jillar

    No Man's Land

    By jillar,


    General
    Nancy
    Quit Date: 07/07/2013
    Posted March 23, 2018 · 
     
    By tahoehal  on May 13 2008 
     
    I seldom start a post, unless it is to honor someone's anniversary. But I feel compelled to share something that I seem to be sharing a lot of lately... and that is my thoughts on 'No Man's Land'. No Man's Land is a dangerous and scary place... and it is a lonely time during a quit.

    I call No Man's Land that period of time between about 1 month and 3 or 4 months into your quit, or about the time from the end of your first month.. This is a time when many people slip and go into a full relapse and have to start over... if they can start over, that is. I have some observations that may help some of you who are literally hanging on by your fingernails... or who may find yourself there tomorrow.

    The first month is an exhausting but exhilirating experience... you are locked in nearly daily struggles and you get the satisfaction of successfully beating your addiction that day. You go to bed a WINNER each night (as Troutnut would say), and you are justifiably proud of yourself. Your friends and family are also supportive as they see you struggling each day to maintain your quit. And you are being constantly supported here, whether or not you post... just being here is good for your quit. And so, the battles are won and it actually becomes easier and the battles occur less often as you finish 30 days or so.

    Around 60 days, you're starting to have some really good days, with very few craves and some nice insights about yourself... but then again, you still have some bad days. Those bad days can really be depressing... you begin to wonder if you're ever gonna be able to relax. Your junkie is whispering to you, telling you that 'just one' won't hurt. You've conquered your daily triggers, but now you start trippiing over the occasional ones... a death in the family, unexpectedly bad news, money problems, health problems, going on a long car ride, a trip to the bar, or whatever. You have a strong crave and you begin to doubt your ability to keep your quit. 

    In addition, the 3D support that you used to get is pretty much gone... non-smokers figure you should be 'over it' by now, smokers don't like to hang around you much because they feel guilty and addicted (remember that feeling?), and people who have quit may not remember just how much love and support you need well into the first few months. They all think you should be 'over it', you think you should be 'over it'... and the temptation is to have 'just one' to see if you ARE over it.

    But of course you're not over it, are you? That 'just one' whisper becomes much much louder and becomes 'just one more'... and each time you give in to that whisper, the craves come harder and sooner. The one way to guarantee that your craves will never go away is to light up, to slide that old cigarette needle into your arm and shoot up. Those craves will be back and keep coming back. But if you protect your quit, your craves will eventually weaken and become even fewer and farther between.

    As you get to around 100 days or so (some will be a bit longer)... you will begin to really get a healthy perspective on your addiction. You will see the huge role that smoking played in your life, you will see clearly what that addiction really cost you. And you will understand that it was a very high price to pay... the loss of your confidence, your emotions, your self-control... your SELF. All enslaved to your addiction.

    And you will begin to see that you can look forward to a non-smoking future without romanticizing your addiction. You see it clearly for the life-stealing evil it was... and is. You see a much different future for yourself than your past has been. And it no longer scares the crap out of you to think that you are done smoking... in fact, you embrace that thought with joy every day.

    But you have to get out of No Man's Land first. How can you help yourself? And how can those of us who have been through it help you?

    First of all, you need to understand that you aren't alone. If you haven't already done so, make a pinky-finger promise with 2 or 3 good quitbuds and exchange phone numbers with them. Promise to call them if you're ever in trouble, and make them promise the same. These are your 'life and death' quitbuddies... you are literally trusting each other with your lives. Then call them... often. Just to see how they are doing, and to tell them you're doing well too. Be totally honest with them, this is life and death.

    Second, understand that you're going to have some unexpectedly bad days... but they are going to be further apart. Shrug them off, laugh your way through them, call your quitbuddies... whatever it takes to get through them without smoking. Some battles will be easy, some will be hard. Come here and post, send qmail, exercise, learn to cook, take up a new hobby. Whatever it takes, keep going to bed a WINNER each night.

    Third, ask some of the older qsters to keep an eye on you... to contact you to see how you're doing. I have been asked to do that for several of you recently and I am happy to do that, as I am sure that others are too. We know that you just need to hold on a little bit longer and change your focus just a little to make that breakthrough. And then you will OWN your quit, and it will be a very comfortable thing.

    Last, take a deep and honest look at your past life... your life as a smoker and compare it to what your life is like now... and what it will be like in the future. You have to develop that vision of your future, of the person that you are going to BECOME now that you have freed yourself. You have to believe in yourself. You have to love yourself enough to deny yourself your addiction.

    No Man's Land doesn't have to be so lonely and scary and dangerous. You need some company and some courage and some faith in yourself. And when you emerge from it, you will not be the same person that entered it.

    Never never never question your decision to quit! This is the most loving thing that you will ever do for yourself. A few days of discomfort in exchange for a lifetime of freedom. You will never find another deal like it.

    Protect your quit. Don't smoke, no matter what.


    Hal 08-20-2004
    A puff is too much, a thousand cartons are not enough. 
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/2704-no-mans-land/
     
     
  17. jillar

    Lies

    By jillar,


    General
    Nixter
    Quit Date: 6/7/15
     
    Posted June 27, 2015 
     
    So basically what I'm figuring out is that cigarettes and nicotine are big fat liars. For all those years they kept me at their beck and call by making me afraid. I was afraid to quit because I thought I wouldn't be able to have fun without a cig. LIE. I was afraid to quit because I thought it would be too hard. LIE. I was afraid to quit because I thought every day would be like day 1. LIE. I was afraid to quit because I wouldn't be "me" without my smokes. LIE!! I am telling you, I feel more joy at social situations than I ever have!! Why? Because I can concentrate on having fun instead of worrying when I can sneak outside for a cigarette. I physically feel soooo much better already. And I'm also really proud of myself. But I have to be honest and say I'm a little pissed that I was duped for so long. Anyway, I'm so happy to be a non smoker. Thanks for being here for me!
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/5558-lies/
     
  18. jillar

    No Matter What, Right?

    By jillar,


    General
    Ramona
    Quit Date: 1/29/2017
     
    Posted September 1, 2015 
     
    In 4 days I will celebrate my 10 month mark.  I've not had a single puff in these 10 months.  I did not sacrifice a single inhale to death sticks.  Astounding!!!
     
    To quit smoking has been my number one, most important goal.  Nothing has come before it.  I've made it this far because I've made this quit my top priority.  If the choice is between smoking a cigarette OR:
     
    punching myself in the face
    slamming my head into walls
    running 3 times a day even when my bones ACHE
    potentially losing my job
    inflicting minor damage to my skin
    gaining 20 pounds
    arguing and screaming with my boyfriend
    asking for help from strangers on this forum
    baking bread/cakes every night in 90 degree heat
     
    I choose the latter - - - because the rules remain:
     
    NEVER TAKE ANOTHER PUFF & NOT ONE PUFF EVER.
     
    To apply these hard-fast rules is the only way to break this incredible addiction. 
     
    Quitting is not for everyone.  Undoing a lifelong dependency, undoing a lifelong coping mechanism, proves too difficult for many folks. 
     
    But I will overcome.  I do not want to forfeit my life to submission & servitude.  I will no longer play supplicant to a host of deadly chemicals.
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/5916-no-matter-what-right/
     
  19. jillar

    Restless

    By jillar,


    General
    babs609
    Quit Date: 07/13/2012
     
    Posted February 6, 2015 
     
    That's the word I used during the acute phase of my quit.  If I called it a "craving" I felt like it had power over me......as if the only thing that will ease that craving is the very thing that caused it and nothing will ever feel normal again..I will never feel relaxed or content again.  To me..the word "craving" went parrallel with "feed the craving"
     
    But when I changed the wording to "restless", it took a whole new meaning for me.  Restlessness occurred because my body is going back to the state it was in before I became a smoker.  Just because I'm restless..is it really my body telling me I need a smoke?  Or is it my junkie brain that's telling me that.  There are all kinds of emotions and feelings that cause us to be restless...hunger, thirst, fatigue, anger, lonliness...and these emotions are exacerbated when we quit smoking.
     
    I knew that the restless feeling was a good thing...it reminded me I was winning the battle every single day.  I knew every day I was able to co-exist along with this restlessness...that it would make me stronger and that much closer to a relaxed place where I felt content and satisfied. 
     
    This newfound attitude is what got me through it.....one day at a time. Committing to NOPE.  No matter what..
     It also spilled over into helping me stay strong and take charge of my health in regards to my diet and regular exercise.  Just because I'm restless doesn't mean I'm hungry.  If I'm restless..then maybe I'm just thirsty...maybe I need to go for a run or a walk.  Maybe I need to call a friend and vent, maybe I'm horny, maybe I'm bored or tired....
    It helped me to be more in tune with my body and recognize exactly what I'm feeling so I am able to address the proper issue..and not try to "guess" what the problem is.
     
    Feeling restless??  Find out why....chances are..it's not a "craving" for nicotine. (especially true after Hell week)
     
    Non smokers get restless too....as a matter of fact, today I feel very restless and still haven't figured out why...one thing I am SURE of..is that I'm not craving a cigarette. 
     
    Now....on to figure out what exactly is it that has me feeling uneasy and aggravated....not sure yet but I will figure it out.  I have more oxygen in my brain these days so, things come to light much quicker for me now 
     
     
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/4389-restless/
     
  20. jillar

    Why Did I Join A Quit Smoking Forum?

    By jillar,


    General
    Tink
    Quit Date: 22/11/2013
    Posted April 13, 2014 
     
    I am not a social media buff, I only have facebook where its my family and friends, people I have known most my life or who I trust and feel comfortable around (I only have about 150 friends added)
     
     I was not good on computers, I can be a bit of a technology phobic -
     
    so why did I join a quit smoking forum?
     
    I really wanted to quit smoking is the answer and I did not feel that I could do it alone, I was looking for support, my whole family smoked and I needed support away from that environment, some place where I could just concentrate on me and my quit, no judgement, no keeping quiet about it and if I needed to moan or was going through a hard time, there was going to be someone looking out for me and keeping me on the straight and narrow when the going got tough because those people supporting had the same goal as me or had walked the path before me.
     
    As soon as I joined I was warmly welcomed and I felt apart of the place straight away
     
    I quickly learned that education, support and understanding played a huge part in me quitting smoking
     
    being around ex smokers who have no other interest but to help you quit smoking, no monies are to be made here, no corporate fog, no quit smoking tea is being sold here, its just truth and experiences and support and that gave me confidence and trust.
     
    Its just us ex smokers here, helping each other, educating each other and the thing I love the most is this forum is run by ex smokers 
     
    I hope that if you are thinking about quitting or have quit and are looking for what I was to help you then please consider joining - I have not regretted one single second of my experience here on QuitTrain.
     
    Kind Regards 
     
    Tracey
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/595-why-did-i-join-a-quit-smoking-forum/
     
  21. jillar

    The Roller Coaster Ride

    By jillar,


    General
    babs609
    Posted February 13, 2015 
     
    Quitting smoking is often referred to a roller coaster ride, and with good reason.  While one minute you are feeling confident and strong that you finally "beat" that sucker.  Thinking.."Yes!  I'm doing it..I'm gonna make it"..only to be followed by feelings of doubt, fear, anger, frustration, sadness, lonliness..and these feelings can change within just moments.  This is the part that would beat me down in prior attempts.  I just was tired of the ups and downs.  I think having the "ups" was actually a deterrent to my quit because it would set me up...when I would feel restless...it would piss me off because I thought I was done with all that.
     
    Please please please...keep in mind...these thoughts that just pop up out of nowhere are not YOU.  Any thoughts that pop in our heads are not actually us.  We aren't controlling them...we are just going about our business and them BAM!  there's a thought.  Now....you have a decision to make.  If you are someone who normally runs with their thoughts...this could be trouble for you.  You actually may believe these thoughts to be true without question.  You give these thoughts power by believing they are true when in fact.....they are a complete lie all made up in your head. 
     
    Being an ex-smoker in the early days or weeks of quitting without truly grasping the reality that your thoughts are not true...then you may be not only heading for relapse but are in danger of becoming a chronic relapser until you change your thought patterns. 
     
    No matter what...don't believe you are a weak person.  This kind of thinking re-enforces to your subconcious that other quitters are stronger and you are weaker and therefore....quitting is harder or even impossible for you.  That's total BULL$HIT.  That just gives the addiction more power.  It's already powerful...more powerful than you.  Otherwise..you would have quit long ago or maybe not even started.  
     
    Although the addiction is stronger than you....it's not smarter. 
     
    "Keep your friends close and your enemy's closer"....that saying couldn't be further from the truth when referring to the addiction.  Learn all you can about the addiction.  Don't just read....absorb it...live it...taste it....feel it...and most of all...believe it.  Learn all the tricks it will try to play on you...learn what fellow quitters have done when faced with these challenges. 
     
    Believe with your whole heart that you are no different than anyone else.  You are not weaker than us...your addiction is not stronger than ours... 
     
    Until you understand that...you will either struggle and continue this fight and give up quitting altogether until illness or death forces you to quit....OR..you will struggle and fight and relapse after relapse after relapse until you either finally absorb the teachings of fellow quitters...wasting months or years in the meantime and just making it harder for yourself than it really has to be.
     
    I wish this could be a post where a lightbulb goes off in your head and you say "aha! I got it!!!  I finally got it"  But that lightbulb moment is different for everyone and that's why I just ask everyone lurking and reading and contemplating quitting...to just keep coming back here...keep reading...keep reading...keep reading.  Lots of posts and video's to help you "undo the brainwashing" that has been planted in your head from the years of being a smoker.  It takes time......it takes patience..it takes re-enforcement... In short, it takes work...but it is sooooooo worth it.
     
    When you finally are ready...and you put down your final cigarette...
     
    Keep your arms and legs in at all times...put your buckle on...and enjoy the ride.  You might as well because even though we enjoy when we feel good...it's the hard times that strengthens you.
     
     
    ONE DAY AT A TIME>>>ONE MOMENT AT A TIME
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/4460-the-roller-coaster-ride/
     
  22. jillar
    October 30, 2016 · IP 
    The recovered alcoholic, the heroin addict, the nicotine addict, deep down each knows the "Law of Addiction."  They've heard it over and over again.  Just one sip, one tiny fix, or one little puff of nicotine, just once, that's all it takes and the addict is back!  They know that either immediately or in a short period of time they'll once again be slaves to their old level of drug use or greater.  We know the Law of Addiction so why do we break it?
     
    There are three primary factors associated with relapse: (1) rewriting the law of addiction; (2) an excuse; and (3) a vague memory.  It doesn't matter if it happens within two hours, two days, two weeks, two months, two years, or twenty, the factors remain the same and apply to all of us.  Rewriting the law of addiction is easy and you don't need a pencil, paper or computer to do it.
     
    Amending the Law of Addition
    "Just one puff" and then "do not pass go, do not collect $200, but go directly to the addict's prison and surrender your freedom for good."  It isn't that the recovering nicotine addict doesn't know or believe the law of addiction because we do.  It's just that we begin to believe that we're the exception.  We convince ourselves that we're stronger and smarter than those who discovered the law, and wiser than all addicts who came before us.  We amend the law.  We put ourselves above it.  "Just one, it'll be ok, I can handle it, I'm stronger than the others, a little reward, it's been a while, I've earned it."
     
    I'm sorry.  As soon as such thoughts begin infecting the mind they tend to start feeding on themselves and in all likelihood your body's period of healing and freedom is over.  Your dreams and hard work are all being thrown into a dirty toilet that one puff of nicotine is about to flush.
     
    Instead of saying that you can handle "just one," a truthful statement would have been "I can handle them all, give them all back to me, my entire addiction, all the ashtrays, the coughs, the stink, the endless stream of 4,000 plus deadly chemicals that come with each puff (including up to 81 known cancer causing agents), the constant gradual destruction of every cell in my lungs and the gradual clogging and hardening of every blood vessel in my body, the 50/50 chance of killing myself 13-14 years early, all the money it will cost me to stay enslaved for years and years to come (together with massive future price increases designed to get me to quit), the growing social pressures that will make me feel even more like an outcast, I want it all back, all of it!"
     
    It's far easier for the junkie mind to create a one puff or one cigarette exception to the law" than admit the truth.  A one pack a day addiction is 7,300 cigarettes a year.  Don't picture smoking just one.  Instead, picture yourself sticking at least a year's supply into your mouth all at once. Try fitting them all into your mouth because in truth that's exactly where they'll be going, year after year after year.  "To thine own self be true."   You deserve the truth - you paid the price - you earned it.
     
    The Perfect Excuse
    The excuse can be anything.  Usually the addict waits for that great excuse to come along, but some get tired of waiting and any old excuse will do.  Even joy!  A reunion with an old smoking buddy, a few drinks with friends, a wedding, a graduation, or even a baby's birth and a free nicotine laden cigar, or trying a harmless looking new nicotine delivery device like the 27 flavors of suckers, the straw, lozenges, candy or even nicotine water or soda, why not!  But joyful or even stupid nicotine relapse is harder to explain to yourself and those you love.
     
    The smart nicotine addict waits for the great excuse, the one that we know we can sell to ourselves and others.  As sick as it may sound, the easiest to sell and the best of all is the death of a loved one.  Although everyone we love is destined to die and it'll happen sooner or later, for the reformed addict it's the perfect excuse for relapse.  I mean, who can blame us for ingesting highly addictive drugs into our bodies upon our mother's death.  Anyone who does would have to be extremely insensitive or totally heartless!  Right?  Losing a job, the end of a relationship, serious illness, disease or financial problems are all great excuses too - it's drug time again!  The addict is back!
     
    Lost Memories
    But an excuse doesn't work alone.  It needs help.  Failing memories of "why" we were willing to put ourselves through the anxieties and emotion of physical withdrawal, and weeks and weeks of psychological adjustment in order to break free, breathe fatal life into any excuse.  Most of us failed to keep a detailed record of why we commenced recovery or what it was like.  Instead, we are forced to rely upon our memory to accurately and vividly preserve the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth.  But now, the memory in which we placed all our trust has failed us.
     
    It isn't that your memory is bad, faulty or doing anything wrong.  In fact, it's working as it should to preserve in as much detail as possible the joyful events of life, while forgetting, as quickly as possible, all the pain and anguish that we've felt, including our disdain for the addict's life we lived.  To have our brains do otherwise would make life inside our minds unbearable.  If women were forced to remember the true agony and intense pain of childbirth, most would have just one.  We are each blessed with the gift to forget.
     
    So how does the reformed nicotine addict who failed to keep accurate records of their journey revive their passion for freedom and recall liberty's price?  If we forget the past, are we destined to repeat it?  Not necessarily.  It doesn't have to be.  But just as any loving relationship needs nourishment to flourish, we can never take our recovery for granted or the flame will eventually die and the fire will go out.  We have to want to protect this glory until the day we die.  We have to turn that "want" into action.  If we do, we win.  If not, our fate may be up in the air with serious risk of relapse followed by crippling disease or even a very early grave.
     
    Whether it's daily, weekly or monthly, our recovery needs care.  If you don't have a detailed log to regularly review when faced with adversity, upon each anniversary of your quit, or at each birthday, do your best to create one now.  Talk to those still smoking and ask for help in revitalizing your memories.  Encourage them to be as truthful as possible.  Although they may look like they're enjoying their addiction to smoking nicotine, the primary joy they get is in keeping their body's blood serum nicotine level within the comfort zone, so as to avoid the onset of the anxieties and craves of early withdrawal.  Show them your pen and paper and invite them to help you create your list.  You may even cause a spark in them.  Be kind and sincere.  It wasn't long ago that those were our shoes.
     
    Also, try envisioning the first week. What was it like?  Can you still feel the powerful craves as your body begged and cried to be fed?  Can you still feel the pain?  Do you see yourself not being able to concentrate, having difficulty sleeping, feeling depressed, angry, irritable, frustrated, restless, with tremendous anxiety, a foggy mind, sweating palms, rapidly cycling emotions, irrational thinking, emotional outbursts or even the shakes?  Do you remember these things?  Do you remember the price you paid for freedom?  Do you remember why you were willing to pay it?
     
    If you have access to a computer, you won't need a smoker's help or even to recall the early days of your own journey.  You can go on-line to scores of smoking cessation support groups and find thousands of battles being fought, hear tons of cries and watch hundreds struggling for survival as they cling to the promise of the rich sense of inner calmness, quiet and comfort that lies beyond.  Visit as often as possible.  Make a few posts to those in need.  The most important thing you can tell them is the truth about why you are there.  Tell them how comfortable and complacent you've become.  It's what they yearn to hear!  Many smoked their entire adult life and have a difficult time believing that withdrawal isn't permanent.  Fear of the unknown is frightening.  Help them and in doing so help yourself.
     
    If you find yourself attempting to rewrite the law of addiction, stop, think, remember, read, revisit, revive and give to others, but most important, be honest with you.  Terrible and emotional events will happen in each of our lives - such is life.  Adding full-blown nicotine relapse to any situation won't fix, correct or undo your underlying concern.  In your mind, plan for disaster today.  How will you cope and keep your healing alive should the person you love most in this world suddenly die?  What will you do? 
     
    Remember, we've only traded places with our chemical dependency and the key to the cell is one puff of nicotine.  As long as we stay on this side of the bars, we are the jailors and our dependency the prisoner. We only have two choices. We can complete this temporary period of adjustment and enjoy comfortable probation for life or we can smoke nicotine, relapse, and intentionally inflict cruel and unusual punishment upon these innocent bodies for the remainder of their life, together with inviting a 50/50 chance that you'll be putting yourself to death. If the first choice sounds better - comfortable lifetime probation - then we each need only follow one simple rule - NEVER TAKE ANOTHER PUFF!
     
    Breathe deep, hug hard, live long!
    John
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/7669-caring-for-our-quit-by-john-r-polito/
     
  23. jillar
    In honor of Quit Train's anniversary the first post written by our founder MarylandQuitter......
     
    MarylandQuitter
    Administrators
    Quit Date: 10/07/2013
     
    Posted March 28, 2014 
     
    Remove the desire to smoke and you will never smoke again.  Practice on removing the desire to smoke until you firmly believe that you get nothing from it.  Until then, use your smoking addiction to help you quit smoking.  That’s right, you read correctly.  You, me and millions more rationalized smoking even though we knew the consequences.  Use those same veteran rationalization skills to rationalize quitting smoking.  Think about that for a minute.  If we could rationalize smoking knowing full well the damaging effects it had on our health, why can’t we rationalize quitting smoking knowing full well the health benefits of quitting?
     
    Based from my experience, the most important attribute to a successful quit, which is a non burdensome quit, is to remove the desire to smoke by understanding and believing that the cigarette has nothing to offer.  This and only this will allow for a lifetime of freedom and never leave you feeling like you’re giving something up or missing out by living life as a non-smoker.
     
    So many have relapsed and so many more are too afraid to quit smoking because of all the horror stories they’ve heard about nicotine withdrawal when you quit.  That horror only exists in our minds, if we let it.  Of course we’ll have mild withdrawal and mental triggers that may cause cravings, but they’re far from horrific and certainly nothing more than we’ve already experienced.
     
    Quitting smoking is not hard.  In fact, the whole process is quite enjoyable if we only focus on the benefits of being a non-smoker.  There is no need to focus on anything else because we’re not giving anything up.   We’re not missing out.  The cravings come and go and soon will be gone forever.  Even while we were smoking, the unwavering loyalty of our body was trying to heal itself while we kept poisoning it.  It never gave up on us despite that we were putting things in our mouths and setting them on fire to feed our addiction.  Once we quit smoking, our bodies take a huge sigh of relief and work overtime to make up for lost time and starts healing and repairing the damage that we caused it.
     
    The easy part for some is the initial quit while for others it’s staying quit.  Ask 10 people and the answers will vary.  The reality is that everyone can quit smoking and stay that way.  If you’re finding it difficult to stay quit it’s because you think the cigarette still has something to offer you.  This is why I relapsed.  This is why others’ invariably relapse.
     
    Never give up and just continue to remove the desire to smoke by knowing with every ounce of who you are that the cigarette offers you nothing.  It can’t do a thing for you.  It’s impossible that it can relieve stress, doesn’t taste good and certainly is no reward.  Some get this right away.  Others, like myself, it took a little longer.  But now that I know this, the desire to smoke has been successfully removed and although I still get a trigger here and there (just part of being a nicotine addict), I know it won’t do a damn thing for me.  You can get there too.  Never, ever stop striving to get there.  Never smoke again. Not one puff, ever (N.O.P.E.).
     
     
  24. jillar
    Nancy
    Posted August 22, 2018 · IP 
     
    FILLING THE PAGES by Eric

    A common topic a quitter might talk about since they quit smoking, is the fact that there seems to be void in their life now. Now that they're not smoking it feels as if the days have grown longer and they are unsure of how to fill this time. Sometimes this can actually put stress the new quitter, because this is so unfamiliar to them.

    Cigarettes have been so deeply intertwined in their life for so long, that the new quitter is constantly being reminded that they no longer smoke just from everyday activities.

    They may ask how do they unwind after work now that they don't smoke? How do they deal with stress, now that they don't smoke? How do they punctuate finishing a task now that they don't smoke?

    For the smoker, that cigarette after finishing a task was like putting the period at the end of sentence. Now that they don't smoke, daily tasks can just feel like a long running sentence with no punctuation.

    The cigarette was also like the smoker's pause button. If they needed to concentrate on doing something or were under a stressful situation. They would step back, smoke a cigarette and think about how to resolve the problem. Now that they don't smoke, there doesn't seem to be a pause button for the quitter. That magic button that says" Whoa give me a minute" is now gone. Now they are just left with the situation and a very unfamiliar way that they now have to deal with it without the cigarette.

    One thing that should be pointed out though, is that we have lived our lives and dealt with stress DESPITE smoking, NOT because of it.

    There was a fellow quitter that was talking about this and it was really stressing her out. She was having a hard time dealing with stress and everyday scenarios without smoking. She was getting discouraged about this and felt that her life just felt kind of empty since she quit. She felt that there was now a void in her life.

    One thing she said though, that I thought was an interesting way to look at it, was that she said that since she quit smoking, was that she felt she now had to rewrite her life.

    When I read this, for some reason it reminded me of someone writing a screenplay about the day in the life of a smoker. This is what it might say.

    -----------------------------------------------------------------
    THE DAY IN THE LIFE OF A SMOKER.

    Dear (anonymous)

    I'm just making this up, but let's just say this is how your typical day when you smoked would look like.

    You wake up. Smoke a cigarette. You get ready for work. Smoke a cigarette. You have breakfast. Smoke a cigarette. You get in your car and drive to work. Smoke a cigarette. You get to work. Smoke a cigarette before going inside. You go to coffee break at work. Smoke a cigarette. You go to lunch. Smoke a cigarette. You go to second break. Smoke a cigarette. Maybe something stressful happens at work. Sneak out and smoke a cigarette. After work, as you drive home, you smoke a cigarette. You get home and unwind. Smoke a cigarette. You cook dinner. Smoke a cigarette. After eating dinner. Smoke a cigarette. Have a glass of wine or beer and of course smoke a cigarette. Watch TV. Smoke a cigarette. Get ready for bed. Smoke a cigarette. Before going to bed. Smoke a cigarette.

    Let's say that it took 5 pages to write the screenplay "In the daily life of (anonymous)."

    Now that you don't smoke, you're not so much rewriting your daily life, but more of editing out a lot of useless dialog in your screenplay that isn't needed to tell the story.

    The problem is that now after all that editing, what use to take 5 pages to tell the story, now only takes 3 pages. Now you still have 2 blank pages that you're carrying around with you and you don't know what to do with them. This can cause anxiety. You have been so used to writing your daily life with 5 pages that writing it with only having to use 3 pages feels like there is a void in the story.

    Really take a look at the dialog that you edited though and put that down on the 2 remaining pages.

    Here's what it would say: Smoke a cigarette. Smoke a cigarette. Smoke a cigarette. Smoke a cigarette. Smoke a cigarette. Smoke a cigarette. Smoke a cigarette. Smoke a cigarette. Smoke a cigarette. Smoke a cigarette. Smoke a cigarette. Smoke a cigarette. Smoke a cigarette. Smoke a cigarette. Smoke a cigarette. Smoke a cigarette. Smoke a cigarette. Smoke a cigarette. etc, etc.

    You can see how useless this dialog is. It doesn't even help tell your story and on it's own it makes no sense. It's just repeated blabber.

    You have two choices now. You can either take these pages and just throw them away, because you no longer need them anymore. Or you can take these two remaining pages and add something to your story. Something that maybe you've wanted to add for sometime now, but just have never done it, because this addiction was taking up those two pages. These two pages are no longer being wasted on telling the story of your addiction. They are now yours to tell any story that you wish to tell.

    It isn't so much that since you quit smoking, that there is a void in your life. It is more that smoking created that void, because it took away from you. That was YOUR time being wasted, it was NOT being filled. Now that you have freed yourself from cigarettes, don't think of it as leaving a hole in your life. Think of it as giving back the endless possibilities of living life as YOU again.

    Also don't think that you need a cigarette to deal with life's stress.

    It isn't that you were able to deal with stress better when you smoked. It's just that you've done it for so long that way, that you are having to relearn how to do it without cigarettes. It's new and unfamiliar. Smoking under stress was a combination of relieving withdrawal, but it also gave you a minute or two to reflect on what was causing the initial stress.

    If you're under stress and where the times you would smoke a cigarette, what I would do is stop. Step back and give yourself a moment just like you would do when you smoked, but now breathe deeply, calm yourself and focus on what you need to do to alleviate what is causing the stress.

    Don't feel that if you're under stress that you have to attack it head on because cigarettes are no longer there to buffer what it happening. You can very easily do this without smoking. You can step back and give yourself a moment to collect yourself and you can do it without cigarettes. They are a useless middleman and you know that cigarettes don't relieve stress. They only relieve withdrawal. They don't deserve that kind of credit.

    You should be proud of yourself, because you have taken your pages back.

    The pages are yours now. Fill them any way you choose

    Eric
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/10920-filling-the-pagesrepost-from-eric/
     
  25. jillar

    The story of a mountain girl...

    By jillar,


    General
    Ladybug
    Posted August 22, 2014 · IP 
     
    I am a "mountain girl" and I know a thing or two about hiking. I was born in a small village in the Alps, directly on the boarder between Italy and Austria, hiking was mandatory -not optional. There was an old joke going around about babies being born with hiking boots, skies and a backpack and I assume its still being told until this day. Not so far off the truth, I have been told I could ski before I actually walked. 
     
     
    Sometimes tourists came to town and stayed for a while in houses like ours. They paid for "room and board" and were treated like King and Queens. Some of us were "hired" for guidance and it was serious business. We all knew the way through the forest and through the mountains; we knew what to show them and where to go to. All of us were able to guide them, however the hiking part was something they had to do on their own -very often for our entertainment (if I may say so). At first I was just the assistant, but then I got my first group alone when I was 15 and I was filled with pride. I planed the tour for days; I knew in which cabin we would eat, where we would rest and I packed my backpack with care. I knew from others that I could run into problems with the tourist-folks. A first-aid kit was needed, because some of them would get blisters as big as tennis balls, just because they went hiking with brand new fancy boots (really?) Some emergency food, flashlights, flares and some other "stuff" and I was ready.
     
     
    I got up at the crack of dawn and collected my tourists and off we went. I showed them the mountain in the distance, the one we would all climb and I got a mixed reactions. Some were excited and couldn't wait to be up there and some felt overwhelmed and started doubting themselves just by looking at it.
     
     
     
    It only took one or two hours depending on traffic (hayrides and tractor pick-ups) and we reached our destiny and could start our real hiking tour. The beginning is always the hardest, especially when it starts with a steep rise right away. I could hear them huffing and puffing and some wanted to turn around right from the start -like that was an option. It got better after a few hours, we left the treeline behind us and hiked in a steady pace, surrounded by beautiful vegetation and animals.
     
     
     
    There wasn't much complaining anymore, they pointed out the different views and enjoyed the tour. We took some breaks, drunk fresh cow milk and ate the apples and butter-sandwiches that we had packed. Even the shortest break somehow recharged the "complaint-department" and some of them started whining again. They wanted to "turn around" and just go back, they were complaining that their bones were hurting and that the tour was just too much, much more then they expected it to be.
     
     
     
    They really didn't have a choice, turning around was only a option in emergencies and they knew it. Some people are just born complainers, they will find a "hair in the soup" before the soup is even served. They expected shortcuts, more breaks and they were wishing for a cable lift and an easy transport right to the top.
     
     
     
    Of course that didn't happen. I was a tough girl, cracked the verbal whip (or played just dumb) and we continued our hiking tour. 
     
     
     
    A few hours later we made it to the top and were rewarded with a breathtaking view. Some just sat there quietly and took it all in, others made a big fuzz out of it. But we all were proud that we made it to the top. Now everybody was just in "awe" and even the one who complained the most, were finally quiet and just filled with pride and joy. Numerous pictures were taken, later on the evidence when they would talk about their hiking tour back home.
     
     
     
    I often read "I just stopped smoking...please pray for me" and I never really knew what to say, until today when I found this quote.
     
     
     "There are too many people praying for mountains of difficulty to be removed, when what they really need is courage to climb them."
     
     
    Isn't the road to freedom of an addiction like a hiking tour in the mountains?
     
     
    You don't need prayers, you need courage and strengths. Start hiking and don't look at it as being a difficulty, look at it as being the road to success. Hike without looking back and without complaints, look forward and think about how you will feel when you reach the top. No shortcuts, no help from a cable lift...just you and your addiction. Take it all in and look forward!
     
     
    Guidance is available at places like  https://www.quittrain.com -you don't have to "hike" alone, other ex-smokers will be on your side. It's similar to the AA meetings just online and it feels so good to talk to people who understand how you feel, because they all have started there on the foot of the mountain ones.
     
     
    In the future when I will read "I stopped smoking, please pray for me" a link to this post will be my answer 🙂
     
    Link to original post: https://www.quittrain.com/topic/2384-the-story-of-a-mountain-girl/
     

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QuitTrain®, a quit smoking support community, was created by former smokers who have a deep desire to help people quit smoking and to help keep those quits intact.  This place should be a safe haven to escape the daily grind and focus on protecting our quits.  We don't believe that there is a "one size fits all" approach when it comes to quitting smoking.  Each of us has our own unique set of circumstances which contributes to how we go about quitting and more importantly, how we keep our quits.

 

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