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Blog Comments posted by notsmokinjo

  1. I grew up in a smoke free house and in Australia where the anti smoking lobby was about 20 years ahead of elsewhere...when I started smoking it wasn't cool ... Only idiots smoked .... As a teen most public places were already smoke free...but smoking for me was a bit if an FU to my mum but also all the safe places growing up, the grandparents, the aunts and uncles I'd get farmed out to smoked that smell to me was safety...and love. 

    Just like you I quit when preggas and didn't stop until I finished feeding...but I knew it was just temporary I had no intention of making it permanent.

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  2. Not really adding anything new here but still gunna chuck in me two bobs worth....so @Paul723 gave you the science....those nicotine receptors are going bat shit crazy as you starve them and turn them off one by one...they are in panic mode....and in the past when you are stressed or scared you smoked...so the little buggers push the shit out of those buttons. There were a whole slew of things I thought I'd dealt with as a kid that resurfaced when I quit .. things I thought were resolved bubbled to the surface...the way I looked at for me it was all about control and I couldn't control my childhood or change the past what I could control was smoking...I was in charge of that...I controlled that...and I kinda liked being the fat controller.....but it boils down to two things said already... (Paraphrased) As @Lilly said YOU ARE WORTH IT...and @Linda Thomas said we are here for you. You aren't alone, you are safe, and I can guarantee at least one other member here has walked in your shoes.


    As you grow you your freedom you level up to the next version of yourself...still the same but stronger and with smoke free super powers.

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  3. Oh jumping in...

    Friends.....I quit in the middle of softball season....lots of me softball mates are smokers...I couldn't avoid them...I will confess to doing the 2nd hand smoking thing but I would have 1 wiff then be off....see I knew I couldn't avoid it, so quick sniff opposite side of the dugout....my rules were simple, I'd allow myself to smell it but I was not having a puff ...it only took a few weeks and U didn't even want that smell hit. But I prooved to myself I could do it.

    Post workout.....expanding on Jill's healthy snack suggestion...carrot or celery sticks...you can air smoke them AND have a nice crunchy chewy snack.


    In my early quit I had a phone app...it had a crave buster feature...this was that card flip memory game....ran for 3mins on repeat...only once did I need to go back to back to beat a crave ..see your brain can't focus on a crave when you are making it do something else. Minesweeper worked too. 


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  4. Post what you want as often as you want....now cos you're knew and I've been awol you may not know that I had a big quit that I threw away years ago.....and then I have this quit, heading into 2 years ... This is what I know....

    1. Big quit, I craved all day every day and spent over 6 years trying to find "an acceptable" reason to smoke....I never got passed the craving...but that's because I never stopped romancing the ciggies and giving them power.

    2. I got educated about how nicotine addiction works.... But most importantly I stopped looking for justifications to smoke...and the cravings went away...not over night or in a few weeks but I don't get those cravings anymore, sure sometimes I'll get these whispered ghosts of a memory flicker through that hey wouldn't a smoke now be nice and immediately I laugh because nope I don't want one. I've got decades of programming to re-write but glitch by glitch it's getting there. Sure some day 30 years down the track a whisper might race across my mind and my gut response is Gunna be "yeah-NAH, I'm the one in control not some remnant nicotine receptor".

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  5. Look at you go super hero. After that initial loss with the hair, give it a day or so and you don't notice it. Just remember when it grows back it's an exciting new present .... it could be the same or completely different. Love the wigs you chose though, they are very nice.

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  6. I went with a 1 buzz. It was just easier. I'm a big soon and didn't like the wig so just rocked scarfs and trubans and bandanas and I had these super soft and gentle headbands that had the triangle scarf bit built in. Scarfs/bandanas were the best because there were lots of different ways to tie them.

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  7. Bald is beautiful.. it says I'm a fighter. It says I am strong. It says I have untold power and strength.... And yet it's still daunting when it happens, I was fine when the hair fell out had one if the kids I tutored buzz it off for me but the day I wiped my eyes and I was left with a handful of lashes, I broke....cried and cried and cried. 

    Not sure what it's like where you are but over hear we have free wigs , if you want to go that way. Check with the support groups they will know what is out there. 

    Just think, often it grows back differently, and you will have virgin hair again, never coloured or permed. Mine came back darker and curlier. Completely different.

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  8. It just sort of creeps up one you, one day you suddenly realise you don't feel like shit and you're not sure when you last did. 


    And the way you feel now, while still not perfect, is better than how you felt 30 days ago for sure. It's just that the improvements are a little each day so you don't really notice. It's like kids..you see you kid every day and don't really clock their daily growth but you see someone else's kid once a month and you notice the growth each time.. well it's sorta the same.

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  9. Oh Pott's... I was doing the math in my head and getting all excited you were nearly on month... Have you noticed, each time you quit you are going longer. OK think about what you learnt this time... 24 days was so much better. Next time we are aiming for infinity... you can do this, you went 24 days. OK is you havn't started again you need to get onto that right away... no more dithering... this is the forever quit.

  10. 3 hours ago, reciprocity said:

    Hiding behind the smoke-screen was much easier.


    That there just sums it up... it was easier to hide than face things head on.


    Ok so I had a few bumps growing up, rough patches within a pretty amazing life.. and I honestly thought I had dealt with all those issues when I quit. But around the 3-6 month mark a lot of issues I thought I had dealt with came back up... my opinion of myself as I was establishing my non-smoking routines was evolving... it was like I had been viewing everything through a haze and suddenly it was clear. Read some of the things I wrote around the 4-5 month mark... I was the same, it was like an identity crisis but I do think its all part of the journey. You aren't going to smoke, but there are aspects of your life that are need to be faced that in the past you probably would have avoided dealing with fully by having a smoke and you are realising that... its a bit of a shock... but you know what its proof you are a sentient being... you are still growing, and evolving and learning and become a better version of you day by day. I am so proud of this post. It is full of hope and it is starting to be full of pride and there is a lightness returning to your perspective. You deserve every happiness and if it means making some changes to reach it then do that sweetie because as someone once told me you are worth it.

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  11. It is going through a reaction... its called detox....use the gum... I did... but to really quit you will need to give the gum up eventually too.... but your brain is screaming for its nicotine hit... it can't re-wire properly while you are still having the gum... so sure, use it for the worst of it but eventually you need to man up and face the detox horror head on without the gum or you will never truely be free.

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  12. "I just have to remind myself I CAN if I want, I just choose not to. I CHOOSE NOT TO!!!!"


    Keep making that choice and you will be free before you know it. Keep going girl.

    So to paraphrase one of the best motivational speeches ever, Alan Jeans 1989 grandfinal address.... "In every *quit* there's going to be a crossroads and when you get to that crossroad you either step up or you step down". .... "Not only you gotta play it moment by moment, contest by contest; Do not accept what is going on"  because it is a contest, you are in a battle with the nicodemon.... and don't accpet what is going on... don't accept the message of the craves you don't need to smoke, it wont make it better... just bristle up, grit your teeth and keep on keeping on.




  13. Sorry Christine, I can't wish you luck because you don't need luck... no luck involved BUT I will wish you strength, courage, tenacity and perseverance... they will help you... luck wont... but the strength to fight the crave, the courage to face the demon, the tenacity to hold onto you quit and keep it and the perseverance to keep doing it day after day after day.

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  14. Also make a note of what did and what didn't work this time. So in a few days when you quit again you will be prepared for what will be thrown at you. Only you can make the choice to put a smoke in your mouth, light it and smoke it and only you can make the choice not to.

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  15. ^^^ What she said. This post is just beautiful in its raw honesty. I'm sorry you got so down but sweetie you fricking kicked that craves arse (with an assist from the hubby)... we have all been there in some, way, shape or form. Be proud of yourself for the fight you just waged and won because you did that, you held your quit and kept it strong.

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  16. Rose I occasionally still get those muscle memory announcements... they aren't really craves anymore... more their like oh I usually do something else now, what do I do?, oh that's right I smoke, wait a minute I don't smoke, stupid Jo smoked but thats finished with now.... and then I move along.


    In the earlier days of my quit it was extreme... the muscle memory smoking prompts were vivid and a bit of a side swipe that rattled my resolve... now they are almost funny when they happen they are so pathetic...


    You really are doing well with your quit, buckle up because there are likely to be a few more bumpy days in your journey yet, half way to one month done. Keep it up.

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