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reciprocity

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Blog Comments posted by reciprocity


  1. Just my thoughts for you here about the wig thing .....................

    My neighbor has lung cancer and has been in treatments for the past year. She wears a wig when she goes out and I have had interactions with her both with and without her wig on. I prefer to see her without it because to me it represents the courage she has in fighting her cancer with tenacity and complete dignity. I do understand wanting a wig for when one goes out in general public when you are exposed to people you don't know or have any connection with but, I think that maybe those who know you and what you are going through might have a very different perspective. I know it inspires me when I see her in her natural state.

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  2. Gutted to read of the passing of your wife Richard. My deepest sympathies to you for your loss. Thank you for having the courage to share this with others. I'm sure your motivation is to make even just 1 person think twice about quitting. Thank you for that. I know it can't be easy to do that.

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  3. 1 hour ago, BKP said:

    "...no more Michelle Bashing, for that will not help"

     

    And the support and encouragement has worked really great, right?

     

    You are in deep denial my friend.  You don't even come out and say "I smoked".  Instead you talk in some abstract terms about your junkie thinking telling you to have one.  I had to read your post twice to figure out that you actually relapsed.  Again.  

     

    I, for one, am going to put you on "ignore" because I think that's exactly what you are doing with the advice you are getting here.  Hope you figure this all out.  You don't know what you're missing.

    It's frustrating isn't it .... when we KNOW what it's like to be free of all that slavery to a killer addiction?

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  4. You seem to have thought this all through and know what you are doing as well as what you have to do in order to break free of being a slave to this addiction so I have no words of wisdom to add other than to say that living for a prolonged period of time in this constant state of early withdrawal is not the way anyone should live. You are in fact making things worse for yourself. Wouldn't it be so much easier to bite the bullet for a few ugly days, get by the worst of it and start healing?  I really hope you find your key to maintaining your commitment to quit over a period of time that lasts for more then just a few days because in the end, that is what's required for any of us that want to quit.

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  5. The worst that your addiction to nicotine can throw at you when you quit will not harm you permanently, only cause you disruption and mental anguish temporarily. The effects of smoking can and probably will harm you permanently or even worse. Keep this in mind when you think you "need" a smoke. The reality is .... you "need" to quit!

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  6. Congrats on your 17 days of freedom from cigs ICH :) You should feel proud. That's a great start and you are already realizing just how crazy smoking was and just how negatively it affected your whole life. That's a huge step forward in the educational process which is key to a permanent quit. That automatic leaning toward having a smoke when you get stressed or unhappy or experiencing any emotion will fade with time. It does for everyone.

     

    Can't help you with the winter issue other than suggest that one way to deal with a change like that is to take up a new hobby or activity suitable to your new environment?  

    11syy40.jpg

     

    Or; maybe not?

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  7. I don't know if any of us have a responsibility to anyone other than ourselves; once we make that commitment to quit. We end up helping others just by participating here whether we know it or not. You are also doing this now. Also, don't forget to think about the 14 days (and counting) of hard work you have put in to date next time you start romancing the cigarette and your smoking past history because .... it IS past history now.

     

    You can't afford to make it your current situation again .... trust me on that one. You have already made your choice and that is the best choice you can possibly make for yourself - you're smoke-free!

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  8. I'm happy you took the time to reason things out properly Kate because that's very important!

     

    Our minds play tricks on us when there's an addiction involved. Our mind suggests relief from our struggle will be the reward if we give in and light up but that is just a lie.

    The truth is, we will be back in chains again, a slave to this addiction that brings nothing but misery and even death. Many have come to this realization too late - AFTER they went and bough that pack and lit one up! Stay strong because you are really doing a great job and this post proves you know how to rationalize the pros and cons of smoking. That's a very useful tool to have at your disposal going forward!

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  9. We've hid behind that smoke screen so long that it's hard to figure things out as a non-smoker sometimes but we must learn to do that and as we do, we find it's not so bad. Facing things head on is a good thing! Get them over and done with then ..... move on :)  Sometimes, I think maybe that's why I didn't quit sooner? Hiding behind the smoke-screen was much easier.

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  10. Yup - that's the way it goes for all of us I think. You end up with a mixed bag of thoughts and feelings on any given day and the whole process seems endless but, it won't be that way forever. Things always change and with quitting, the longer the time you invest in the process, the better the changes become. Surely you must notice that when you think back to your first week or so of quitting? I know I am still seeing improvements in my quit after over 1 1/2 years. They aren't pronounced and they are very slow in coming but I have even less desire to ever smoke again than I had after 1 full year. The mental healing process is ongoing for all of us. It won't skip by you Tammy - it can't! All you have to do is continue the path you're on and it will ALL come to you, just as it does for all of us :) 

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  11. On 11/15/2018 at 6:12 PM, WeegieWoman said:

    I had many a quit where I was quick to cave. But those experiences helped me get where I am today. 34 years old and over one year quit. I kept trying and this time it stuck. 

    Is there anything in particular that you can identify that made this one work for you Weegie? 


  12. Yup! What Jillar said. Just be determined to do it now! None of us know "for sure" if we have quit forever. All we know is that we will not smoke TODAY! That's the whole idea of the nope thread. Pledge your self commitment to stop smoking just for today :) Days add up and before you know it, smoking seems like a distant memory. I know ..... hard for you to believe today. I've been there myself C12. So have all the others here. Guard your resolve closely in the early days. That nicomonster will be whispering sweet nothings in your ear during these days. Don't listen!

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  13. This might just be your defining moment C12. Think about that for a moment.

    Love Jo's quote about Crossroads and stepping UP or stepping DOWN!

    Always step UP!! This is the road to freedom :) Life long is possible for all of us and YES, that includes you C12!

    Be kind to yourself in these early days C12. You know quitting is worth the effort or else you wouldn't be here :)

    We are cheering you on!

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  14. It's always easy to rationalize that if we were still smoking, all life events would be so much better. NOT TRUE! The addiction adds another layer of ugliness to our lives. Think of it this way; "my life is off the rails at the moment so if I was smoking, it would be SO much easier.

     

    NO! The smoking addiction would just allow you to avoid those undesirable life events. You'd be outside somewhere obsessing about the life issue while smoking a cig. Great! You are adding self destruction to the temporary life issue - Nice ?

    • Like 1

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QuitTrain®, a quit smoking support community, was created by former smokers who have a deep desire to help people quit smoking and to help keep those quits intact.  This place should be a safe haven to escape the daily grind and focus on protecting our quits.  We don't believe that there is a "one size fits all" approach when it comes to quitting smoking.  Each of us has our own unique set of circumstances which contributes to how we go about quitting and more importantly, how we keep our quits.

 

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