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NOPE; Evelyn's Blog


So here I am, day 2

Posted by Evelyn , 19 May 2017 · 280 views

Here I am. Day 2 and I'm not gonna blow myself up. Just gonna write where I bump into, what triggers me, what helps.... etc.

I've found a big trigger. Which was already mentioned... Coffee, in my case too much coffee - I get all sparkly and hyper and my cravings become more intense. So - luckily I use instant coffee - I'm gonna be careful how strong I'm...


Invincible; I am free

Posted by Evelyn , 09 October 2016 · 583 views

I am invincible, just NOPE... and be free. The strength is within you, in every person.

Now is the time to jump on the train...! No need to be scared! NOPE, not anymore!


YOU are in control; chose either NOPE without the lies or lie and die...

Posted by Evelyn , 20 September 2016 · 343 views

'No More' truth or dare: final quitdate 15 September 2016

We wrote this on a blog about quit smoking, the members know we have DID.

No more cigarettes. No more deceiving, no more lies. Oh boy have I fall for lies and deceivement, oh boy.
Who lied most. The people who should have been my safe haven, they lied, hurt, abused, drank and lied again... they...


I am so sick and tired

Posted by Evelyn , 16 July 2016 · 401 views

... of this pain, hurt, anger, tears. Sjeesh waiting for 4 hours now before my dinner meals will be delivered. I am done, pissed off. I crave a smoke and a booze. I won't I WILL NOT DO THAT!

Okay afer sleeping in bed 2 hours and waking in midst of cravings I asked myself WHY?

It's about hiding, not feeling; a natural response for your brain!!! To get ou...


New chapter ~ kick-off week 2

Posted by Evelyn , 13 July 2016 · 251 views

I decide to choose 'love life' and here and now. My therapist let me chose a 'here and now stone' which I can grab, feel, touch when I drift off to older, bad days. Hadn't seen him in 5 weeks... dreadfull weeks. He was awsome and guess what so was I!!!
How close was I of exploding today, with my SOS; luckily I did it. That SOS saved my quit. I SAVED MY QU...


4 sticky days feeling good - reflecting on one week

Posted by Evelyn , 11 July 2016 · 177 views

I just woke up. I'm pretty wakey wakey, going out for a social meeting thingy; dunno how to translate (hey it's 8in the morning huh!) and they will be puffing anf smoking and drinking strong coffee. I promissed myself one bottem of strong coffee and smoking wasn't even on my mind ;)

Booze is NOT a good upper, Saz is right finally after a week I stabalise...


Love yourself, embrace life!

Posted by Evelyn , 10 July 2016 · 324 views

When you smoke, you don't care as long as you get your fix: but you do not care for your well being. In fact most smokers hate 'their habbit' but don't have a clue how to throw it out the window.
There's a few things: 1- fear of quiting (withdrawls) 2- low self esteem and 3- no real commitment to stick with your decision to quit.
You can get tons of advic...


Almost 3 days; Alegria

Posted by Evelyn , 09 July 2016 · 247 views

I am pleased. And I'm also going to be open, not for my sake but for those who struggle with mental health problems, various from anxiety to depression to borderline... I a proud. I am proud standing here with my almost 3 days on my ticker. Not that the quitng is a huge accomplishment... but quiting when you have to deal with anxiety, or in my case dissoc...


My anger issues + new fresh quit = explossive??

Posted by Evelyn , 15 June 2016 · 285 views

I'm blowing up so angry. Dunno why. I'm angry at the anger...
Hold on, rewind: Fresh start, new STICKY quit and so friggin irritated, angry, Joel says it's normal... Is it?
Am I finally feeling? Am I human enough, no longer the weirdo-- the mental health 'one'.

No, it's hormones, mix them with new medication, stick a new sticky quit in it: poof there's o...



Posted by Evelyn , 07 January 2015 · 443 views

I'm free, I live in freedom from cigarettes or their substitutes Nicotine Replacement Therapy: a full 2 weeks without nicotine and NOW I know what it's like to not crave, crawl upon the ceiling for a cigarette, screw my quit because I'm in continues withdrawals from NRT. The poison left my body and all what's left is mental junkie thinking; don't buy it,...

October 2017

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