I'm 20.. but life is a little stressful right now...I have 2 babies, working full time..saving to buy a house....I'm still young and won't be affected long term by this smoking...no big deal...right? I'll quit definitely by the time...
I'm 25.....still a lot of my family and friends still smoke...they seem to be okay. That must mean I'll be ok..My parents both smoked for years and they are both still healthy and vibrant...look at all these people outside..taking a smoke break with me...we are all ok right???
I'm 30.....starting to get a little nervous...my dad quit, my sister quit, handful of friends are jumping ship,. I've had 15+ years of smoking now and fear is creeping in a little. Fear of quitting..and never enjoying life as I know it...and fear of never quitting and suffering a horrible disease and feeling the effects of smoking. Time to dig that hole in the sand deeper and put my head in there...I'll quit when...
I'm 36..Dad is diagnosed...Stage 4 lung cancer..inoperable. My smoking has now doubled! I know...he's dying and I'm smoking more...what is wrong with me? As dad lie in a coma taking his last breaths...I whispered in his ear "I promise daddy, I'm going to quit smoking". I purchased a copy of Allen Carr's easyway to quit smoking and I did it...I quit smoking!! Yay me!!!! 3 months later...I start getting restless...cravings are coming left and right...I read the book again but the words aren't jumping out at me like they did when I first read it...I felt like I was losing my mind. I looked at the back of the book and called a number they listed as support...It was in London. The book was old and the number was for the publishing company, not a support line. I was losing my strength...and ultimately relapsed. I will probably be a smoker for life....I can't do this again....
The next 8 years are a blurr....that book remained on my shelf collecting dust--every once in a while I would glance at it with guilt and say...some day...maybe in the spring when it's nice out, maybe the summer, maybe the fall, after christmas,...new years resolution, after my birthday....ok..after spring again..one excuse after another. I was smoking more than ever. I did quit a few times during that time...few days or weeks..only to smoke again...always started with one puff.
Finally...at the age of 44...after all that struggle, relapse, disappointment, denial, and thousands of excuses....I finally picked up that book..knowing this was it...I was either going to quit for good this time...or I was going to remain a smoker till my death. I knew I just didn't have another quit in me otherwise. I can't keep going through the torture of quitting over and over..it's exhausting..and the pain from relapse is too distressing.
So, my final quit began. Only this time...I knew that the quitting journey was a roller coaster and even though I feel strong in my quit one day...doesn't mean I will still feel that way the next. I proved that on my last quit. I Googled quit smoking support and got it. Best thing I ever did to ensure that I would never smoke again. I introduced myself and became a member.
Point of the story is....time moves so quickly..and the excuses are just that....excuses. Before you know it...nearly 30 years have gone by. The best time to quit is TODAY....tomorrow has a way of always being that carrot that dangles out in front of you...never able to reach it. Addictions are design to hook you for life. I do wish I quit sooner, I do wish I never smoked. But wishing for something that is in the past, is a waste of time. The only thing I can change is what I do from now on.
My quality of life is so much better today. I am healthier, happier, and confident. I have quite a smoking history and am full aware it may come back to bite me in the ass...however I will not die a smoker chained to addiction. No matter what. I am free.
If you are reading this and still smoking, please.....sign up...join today. Read all the information here and in the blog and educate yourself about nicotine addiction. Don't just read once..read again and again and again until you "get it".
You will never regret that you quit smoking but there is plenty of regret when you don't.
Quit today....no more excuses.
- Jenny, Nicole Diver, Soberjulie and 33 others like this